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10 Things To Avoid Saying To Her In a Relationship

Relationship advice

By onenrwoth francisPublished about a year ago 9 min read
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When it comes to relationships, communication is key. However,

there are certain things that it's best to avoid saying to your significant other. Words of love can be easily misinterpreted or taken out of context, so it's important to choose them carefully.

In this post, we'll discuss 10 things to avoid saying to her in a relationship in order to maintain the strength and trust of your bond.

1) I told you so

One phrase that should always be avoided in any relationship is "I told you so." Saying this to your partner can come off as condescending, dismissive, and hurtful. No one wants to hear those four words, especially not from someone they love and trust. If your partner makes a mistake or does something that you had warned them about, it's important to approach the situation with empathy and understanding Instead of saying "I told you so, " try saying something like, "I know this is hard, but we'll get through it together. " By showing your support and encouragement, you can help your partner learn from their mistakes without making them feel belittled or ashamed. It's also important to remember that nobody is perfect. We all make mistakes, and in a loving relationship, it's important to support and uplift each other rather than tearing each other down. So the next time you feel the urge to say "I told you so," take a step back and think about how you can approach the situation in a more positive and supportive way. Your partner will thank you for it, and your relationship will be stronger for it.

2) You're overreacting

One of the worst things you can say to your partner in a relationship is "you're overreacting". This phrase is dismissive and invalidates your partner's feelings and emotions. When you tell someone that they are overreacting, you are essentially telling them that their thoughts and feelings are not important or relevant. This can cause significant damage to your relationship and make your partner feel unloved and unsupported.Instead of telling your partner that they are overreacting, try to understand where they are coming from.

Ask them to explain why they feel the way they do and listen actively without judgement. Acknowledge their feelings and validate them by saying things like "I understand why you feel that way" or "I'm sorry that you are upset". Remember, love and respect are the foundation of any healthy relationship. Dismissing your partner's feelings is a surefire way to erode that foundation and damage the trust and respect that you have built with one another. So the next time you feel like telling your partner that they are overreacting, take a deep breath, try to see things from their perspective, and respond with kindness and empathy.

3) Calm down

When your significant other is upset, telling them to calm down may seem like the logical solution. However, it is one of the most unhelpful things you can say to them in a relationship. It dismisses their feelings and sends a message that you are not interested in listening to what they have to say. Instead of telling your partner to calm down, try to understand why they are upset. Show empathy and love towards them. Say things like "I understand this is bothering you, " or "I can see why this is frustrating for you." Listening to their concerns and offering support can go a long way in strengthening your relationship. It is important to remember that your partner's emotions are valid and dismissing them with a simple "calm down" will only cause more harm than good. So, next time your partner is upset, put yourself in their shoes and approach the situation with love and compassion. Your relationship will thank you for it.

4) It's not that big of a deal

One of the worst things you can say to your partner in a relationship is "It's not that big of a deal.

" While you may think you're minimizing the issue, to her it can feel dismissive and uncaring. It's important to remember that what may seem like a small problem to you may be a big deal to her.

Saying "It's not that big of a deal" can make her feel like her feelings aren't important to you and that you're not taking her concerns seriously. It can create a rift in the relationship and make her feel like she can't come to you with her problems.

Instead, try to listen to her concerns and validate her feelings. Even if you don't think it's a big deal, acknowledge that it's important to her and show that you care. A little empathy can go a long way in maintaining a healthy and loving relationship. Remember, love is about compromise and working together to solve problems. Dismissing her concerns with "It's not that big of a deal" can damage the relationship and create a lack of trust. So, the next time your partner comes to you with an issue, take the time to listen and work towards a solution together. Your relationship will be stronger for it.

5) I'm sorry if I hurt your feelings

In any relationship, there are bound to be misunderstandings and conflicts. But one of the worst things you can say when trying to resolve a dispute is, "I'm sorry if I hurt your feelings." This statement not only shows a lack of understanding of your partner's emotions, but it also puts the blame on them for being hurt. If you truly love someone, you should care about their feelings and take responsibility for any actions or words that may have hurt them Instead of trying to deflect the issue, try to actively listen to your partner's perspective and understand where they're coming from. Apologize sincerely for any hurtful behavior and work together to find a solution that works for both of you. Remember, a healthy relationship requires communication, empathy, and mutual respect. Saying "I'm sorry if I hurt your feelings" may seem like a quick fix, but it ultimately does more harm than good. Be open to feedback and willing to take responsibility for your actions. This will not only strengthen your relationship, but it will also help you grow as a person.

6) What are you thinking?

Asking your significant other what they're thinking may seem innocent enough, but it can actually be a loaded question. For starters, it puts them on the spot and implies that they're not being communicative enough. Plus, if they're not ready or willing to share their thoughts, it can lead to frustration and tension in the relationship. Instead of putting pressure on them to reveal their innermost thoughts and feelings, try creating a safe and open environment for communication. Show that you're interested in hearing what they have to say, but also respect their boundaries if they're not ready to share just yet. Additionally, avoid assuming that you already know what they're thinking.

This can lead to misunderstandings and hurt feelings. Instead, ask open-ended questions that allow them to express themselves fully without feeling like they're being judged or interrogated. Remember, communication is key in any relationship. By creating a supportive and respectful environment, you'll be able to build a stronger connection with your partner and avoid unnecessary tension.

7) You're being ridiculous

In any relationship, it's important to be respectful and considerate of your partner's feelings. One phrase that should never be uttered is "you're being ridiculous. " This dismissive statement is invalidating and hurtful, and it can make your partner feel as though their feelings and concerns don't matter. Relationship advice experts advise against using this phrase in any situation. It can cause your partner to feel defensive and make them more reluctant to open up to you in the future. In a new relationship, using this phrase can be particularly damaging because it can make your partner feel insecure and question whether you truly care about them. Instead of saying "you're being ridiculous," take a moment to listen to your partner's concerns.

Even if you don't agree with their point of view, validate their feelings and show empathy. Ask questions to clarify what they're feeling and why. This will help you to understand their perspective and build a stronger connection. Remember that in any relationship, it's important to prioritize communication and respect. By avoiding dismissive phrases like "you're being ridiculous," you can build a healthy and strong relationship with your partner.

8) Why can't you just let it go?

When you say this to her, it can be incredibly dismissive of her feelings and can make her feel like you don't care about her emotions. Instead of asking her to just "let it go," try to understand where she's coming from and why the situation may be bothering her. Maybe there's a deeper issue at play that needs to be addressed. In any relationship, communication is key, and it's important to validate each other's feelings and perspectives. It's especially important in a new relationship to establish trust and a foundation of mutual respect. So, the next time you feel like telling her to just let it go, take a step back and think about how you can work together to find a resolution. Remember that relationships require effort, understanding, and patience, and by avoiding these hurtful phrases, you can build a stronger connection with your partner. Overall, relationship advice is all about respecting each other, listening actively, and working together towards a common goal. So, don't let these negative phrases derail your relationship. Instead, focus on open and honest communication, and you'll be on your way to a healthy and fulfilling relationship.

9) I don't know what you're talking about

In any relationship, communication is key. And one of the most frustrating things you can say to your partner is, "I don't know what you're talking about." It can make your partner feel like they're not being heard or understood. It can also make them feel like they're crazy or imagining things. When you say, "I don't know what you're talking about," it shows that you're not willing to engage in a conversation or take responsibility for your actions. It can come off as dismissive, and your partner might interpret it as you not caring about their feelings or perspective. If you find yourself in a situation where you genuinely don't understand

what your partner is trying to communicate, don't be afraid to ask for clarification. Say something like, "Can you please explain that to me a bit more? I want to make sure I understand. " This shows that you're actively trying to listen and understand your partner's point of view. Remember, the point of being in a relationship is to work together as a team. If you're constantly brushing off your partner's concerns or disregarding their perspective, your relationship is bound to suffer. So the next time you find yourself tempted to say, "I don't know what you're talking about, " try to put yourself in your partner's shoes and work towards finding a solution together. This is just a small piece of relationship advice for those in a new relationship. Learning to communicate effectively is crucial for the long-term success of any relationship. So be willing to listen and be open to understanding your partner's perspective, even if it may be difficult at times. Your relationship will be better for it.

10) Fine, do whatever you want

One of the most damaging things you can say to your partner is"Fine, do whatever you want." This phrase communicates a sense of apathy and disinterest in your relationship and can be incredibly hurtful.When you say "Fine, do whatever you want," you're essentially telling your partner that you don't care about their feelings or opinions. It can make them feel like their needs and desires aren't important to you, which can cause resentment and distance in your relationship. If you find yourself saying this phrase often, it might be a sign that you're not fully invested in your relationship. It's important to remember that love requires effort and commitment. You can't expect your relationship to thrive if you're not willing to put in the work So instead of brushing your partner off with "Fine, do whatever you want," try to listen to their perspective and understand where they're coming from. Show them that you value their input and that you're willing to work together to find a solution.In the end, healthy relationships require open communication and mutual respect. By avoiding dismissive phrases like "Fine, do whatever you want, " you'll be able to build a stronger and more fulfilling connection with your partner. Remember, it's never too late to improve your relationship, and seeking relationship advice can help too, especially if you're in a new relationship.

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