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Surprise Surprise Baby #3
I remember 2 years ago I was writing about my experience after having my second child Ayva. I talked about how things were so different for me because I was more mature, financially stable, married, and overall, in a good space despite the ups and downs that life already was giving me. At that point I knew that I was not going to have anymore kids until my daughter was at least 5 years old. Once my 6wks of postpartum was up I went to the doctor to get on birth control. The birth control I chose was the Skyla IUD which would be good for 3 years. I knew that at that point I would have excelled more in life and my balance on being a mom would have been pretty much perfect. However, in January of 2020 my life changed because I found out I was pregnant again. January 2020 was already starting off bad, at this point me and my family has lost just about everything and it seemed like nothing was going to give. Everything that I wanted to be better at seemed to get worse. I was financially screwed, I was not happy with my job, marital problems were an issue and over all depression. My kids could not tell how hurt I was on the inside because I could not give them anything but the minimum to survive. As time went on, I knew that something was off. My body just was not feeling right, I did not want to eat, I was exhausted, and just overall down. These symptoms seemed very familiar to me because they were the same symptoms that I had when I was pregnant with my daughter, but the fact that I was on birth control helped me easily excuse those symptoms for being everything but pregnancy symptoms. I remember telling my sister “girl if I weren’t on birth control you would swear, I was pregnant” because I am showing all the signs. After awhile my mind was telling me look, I know it is crazy but let us just rule pregnancy out so that you know for sure that this is depression you are going through right now. One random workday in January I was on my lunch break and needed to go to Publix to pick up some money that my husband sent to me at this point this was all the money that I was going to have until payday so there wasn’t any room to waste it. Once I took care of this deed, I called my sister as I was walking around the store and we started talking again about me possibly being pregnant. I went into the aisle of all aisles with the pregnancy tests and could not believe that I was even considering that I was pregnant again. I looked at the prices and shook my head because Publix in my opinion is expensive. I told my sister I could not afford to spend money on a legit pregnancy test especially if there was a big chance that I was not pregnant. At that time losing money for nothing was not an option, because I still had sometime left on my lunch I drove to Dollar Tree, in my mind I felt like ok this is more reasonable and I would only be wasting $2 vs. 10+. Once again, I approached the aisle of all aisles and picked up two $1 tests. When I got to the counter the cashier said would you like your receipt, I immediately said NO and she laughed. After this I went back to work and finished my day anxious to get home and finally put my mind at ease. As most women know waiting for the results of a pregnancy test are so nerve wrecking no matter the results. When I finally had some time, I went to the bathroom with my daughter following right behind me and took the test. Honestly, I just knew I was not pregnant, so I sat the test down, looked away and finished up using the bathroom. Finally, I looked up and my heart dropped, the test was 100% clear as day positive. I screamed “OH HELL NO” and immediately got my sister on the phone, we were both in shock. Of course, I called my mom next, I said “Ma what does it mean when the test is saying positive but I’m on birth control” she laughed and said Yanna that is positive you’re pregnant. After staying on the phone with her for a little bit I called back my sister, we were both still stunned because she was coming up on the last couple weeks of pregnancy herself. The next person I knew I had to tell was my husband. At the time he was a truck driver, so he was not going to be home for another week or two. I was so anxious, but I wanted to wait to tell him face to face so I took a deep breath and kept the news between me, my mom, and sister. After the overwhelming rush of shock passed, I started to become very nervous, scared, and anxious. Life was already seeming like a downward spiral and now I was pregnant with an IUD and no medical insurance. What the hell am I going to do was all I thought about until I closed my eyes that night. I remember holding my stomach thinking wow, just wow. When I got to work the next morning, I immediately told my boss I need to go to the emergency room because I tested positive for pregnancy and I was on an IUD for birth control. Nonchalantly she said we did not have anyone to cover my shift and if I could wait 2 days until they knew they would have availability. This is when I knew that if it is not happening to them some people can show lack of interest for what is going on in your life especially with work. I was so upset because I was terrified, looking up stuff on google constantly was freaking me out because I knew I was not supposed to be pregnant. There were so many risks and my job want me to wait till it is convenient for them for me to take off and see a doctor. It was hard trying to explain to someone that I was pregnant but on birth control because no one took me as serious. When my job finally gave me time off I went to the health department first and the lady I spoke with didn’t even know what to say because I was telling her I was on birth control but testing positive for pregnancy. I did not have a lot of options because I did not have money or medical insurance so despite the bill medical bill, I knew I had to go to the ER. That night when both my kids were sleeping, I told my mom in law I was not feeling well and needed to go to the ER, and she agreed to watch the kids. It was about 9:30 at night already, emergency rooms take forever and although I had to be up at 6am the next morning I needed to get this figured out. Fast forwarding throughout my night I surprisingly did not have to wait to long to be seen, I took another urine test and blood test. Once again, I spoke with the doctors and I got “this girl is wasting our time” vibes because no one seemed to be taking me seriously. After an hour or so the ultrasound technician came in and the next thing I hear is “there’s your baby”. It was so surreal I remember saying “omg I can’t believe it; I knew I was crazy”. I was a good 7wks into my pregnancy and did not even know it. Leaving the ER felt so different because I knew for a fact, I was pregnant it was official. There was still a lot of confusion and stress involved because I had no way of getting in contact with a doctor the ER doctor gave me someone to follow up with but because I didn’t have insurance I wasn’t able to pay for the appointment. This part of my pregnancy was so scary, I was that 1% who was pregnant with an IUD still in place. There were so many risks for my health and the baby’s. Everything that did not matter before mattered so much more to me. I was scared to walk, scared to jump, scared to play with my daughter because I did not want to make stuff worse. I finally got help 2 weeks later after coming across a clinic that could help me at no cost until my application for Medicaid was approved. When I saw the doctor, she immediately took my IUD out but warned me that there could be complications of a miscarriage. Apparently, my IUD was close to falling out on its own, so I guess that was easier access to being fertile and becoming pregnant. At this point I am like ok I am having this baby I know it is not the best time, but it is what it is. Hearing the word miscarriage made me so scared, I did not want to lose my baby. Unfortunately, my husband was not able to make it home when he was supposed to, so I ended up telling him I was pregnant over the phone and boy was he shocked. After a long back and forth talk we of course decided that no matter what we were going to see this pregnancy through despite how unfortunate our finances were. I had my ultrasound appointment to confirm I was still in fact pregnant and once I saw the baby I walked out with ultrasound picture in my hand like damn here we go again, but I was happy. Despite the risk of having an IUD in the earlier stage of my pregnancy I had an amazingly healthy pregnancy once it was removed. My daughter’s due date was Sep.1st and I had her Sep.6th, she was 8lbs and 4oz of perfection. The thing that gets to me is how crazy life is and it really makes you wonder why things happen. All my kids give me purpose and I believe that therefore I had my daughter she was giving me another purpose to live and be the best mom I can be. My experience with getting pregnant while on birth control is different from others but the fact is that it is possible. It is one of the most intense fears when your body reacts differently than even doctors have predicted. My journey of motherhood just got a little harder but being able to fall in love again with a life I made was so worth it.
By Maelyn Jeffers6 years ago in Families
Without A Guide
My mother used to tell me all the time, “There's no book to tell you how to be a parent, I've tried my best with what I had and hoped for the best." She's right there's no guide to be a parent, in this world your criticized if your children are not of the best standards, or more well off than you were, but if they become than you then they say what adverse challenges for one had to overcome to have grown up in such a life. Well, mom this one's for you.
By UNpretentious6 years ago in Families
QUARENTEEN REALCRIES
So I went into this quarantine like what the fuck is this shit. this is fucked but alright no work. now its 7 weeks into this and I'm like fuck this shit. Don't get me wrong I love spending time with my significant other and my children and i never thought that i would be longing to go back to work. two weeks before This whole shit started I got laid off of construction waiting on a new job site to start in April and before applying as a Firefighter in our relocated area. Not to mention six months before that my family and I resided in a house in Keswick where the septic tank ended up leaking into the well water that we used because the owner turned the garage into an illegal apartment where there were four family off of one well and one family septic tank. resulting in my three children my wife and myself getting ecol Yup...THATS RIGHT...GAD DAMN ECOLI in 2019 in Canada a family of five got e coli. I never thought that would happen.Then the beginning of the Quarantine my partner and kids are at my sisters in Toronto for a weekend visit. Quarantine hits and we get stuck in Toronto for a month. My sisters and my brother in-law are all essential services for community living stray children and construction so we were always driving around in a bare ass city with only zombie crack heads on the streets. The entire time I'm having panic attacks because the cops are treating the city like its the end of the world. my partner was having panic attacks every time I left the house cause Toronto was like the epicenter of Canada and she didnt want to bring the virus back to her parents. It took us three and a half weeks to convince ourslves we were fine. So now we are 7 weeks into the quarantine and my wife and kids and I are at her parents house. Throughout my life I realized that there are certain things that happen that make you never forget things that happen in your life. like 911,H1N1 , The Big Black out and Y2K. there are things that stick out in your mind that you remember so vividly. i realize that the past couple years with my family have thought me that anything can happen and that you have to make the best of every situation you are in. From e coli to a three hour relocation to quarantine. I know that my kids will look back and remember that Mom&Dad did every thing in their human power to keep us safe. thee boys in a world that looks like every thing is out to get them. I sit in front of my eight year old son fighting with him to do his school work while he daydreams about the birds flying by the window hoping that he will never live a struggling life like his father. then I realize that even through the short time he has been here already he has seen so much that he cold possibly survive better than myself in today society.
By Real Robert Hall6 years ago in Families
There Was More to Uncle Willie than Just Wit
Like the Yankees, the Monetti's had a very deep bench. I had so many aunts, uncles and cousins to rejoice in at family get together's, that it was almost dizzying. And then out of nowhere, we'd go visit Uncle Willie. I was reminded he was a star in his own right, and a telling moment from his 80th birthday party revealed that he could roll as well as the rest of the roster.
By Rich Monetti6 years ago in Families
Blood is Thicker Than Water, Always.
Being bullied from middle school throughout high school was a very life changing experience, however it built character. Personally, I find myself still learning about myself in the midst of forgiveness and healing, but that’s what life is all about. I remember being tormented in my last year of eighth grade and coming home crying to my older brother about my appearance and how much I wanted to look like a different girl.
By Tiffany Linton6 years ago in Families
An April Kind of Day
Her day had been a definite eight out of ten on the bad scale of long and taxing ones. To begin with, it started way too early; even earlier than her usual four am workday alarm. It had started with a phone call from the nursing home around three thirty from a familiar and panicked voice on the other end complaining that “the nurses aren’t giving me my medicines and they won’t give me any coffee.” As the seasoned nursing professor sat up in bed and listened to her mother, there was no being worked up in emotions, as she had run interference many times before. The difficult part was calming and appeasing her cherished, yet very stubborn parent. The staff would listen and follow any suggestions she would give them, not only because they knew her so well, but because she had been a clinical coach in college to many of them. Her mother would get a cup of coffee.Having put that small fire out, coffee didn’t sound like such a bad idea. Besides, her cat was insisting on being fed and the two dogs needed to go outside. She remembered she would need to dry her uniform to make sure it was fluffed out of any wrinkles. “Ah, another day,” she thought, as her morning routines began. By this time her mind had fast-forwarded to the plans she had for her students at the clinical facility where they were training.
By Shirley Belk6 years ago in Families
Betrayed
This story starts with my 2nd marriage; a little background for you to understand things: I was 26 living in NM and had a 6 year old girl Michelle and a 9 month old boy Chris, I was not getting along well with Chris' dad and so we separated. We had a mutual friend, who I will call Mr. S, and he helped me move out, and at the same time he took the opportunity to ask me out on a date. Mr. S told me how he had always wanted to date me since meeting me but I was never free, and knowing that I was now he wanted to get in before he lost the chance.
By Angelina M. Daugherty6 years ago in Families
Finding Balance As A New Mom
The arrival of a baby completely transforms the world for a woman. That's why it is said that a mother is also born with a baby. A new mom starts feeling that she is not in control of her life anymore. This is especially true for working women who find it difficult to strike a balance between work and motherly responsibilities. Striking a balance for a new mom also means not neglecting her welfare as is the case with many new mothers who stop living their lives as per their requirements but adjust as per their children's needs.
By Angel Dipti6 years ago in Families
Proper Fractions
A proper fraction is a number whose value is less than one and the numerator is less than the denominator. So what does mathematics have to do with this challenge? Well, for my open letter to a best friend I have chosen to write to my four children. When I think of whom my best friend is I have to include them all. Each child representing one quarter of a whole has unique attributes that when combined together, create one amazing unit.
By Marilyn Glover6 years ago in Families
7 Nigerian Actresses Who Are Real-Life Husband Snatchers
It's not just in the movies. Even in Nigeria, as frowned upon and shameful the act of husband snatching is in the eyes of so many, a couple of Nigerian celebrities have still gone ahead to do it. Personally I find that term “husband snatcher” very funny. It sounds like you snatched, that is just took without asking, the husband from the other woman. But these are not toys that can just be snatched, they are full-grown men who by themselves decided to follow these women. So while I don’t like the way the word ‘husband snatcher’ makes women look like they are the bad guy, it is the Nigerian term for what these women did and how the Nigerian people see them as – husband snatchers.
By Jide Okonjo6 years ago in Families
Dominicana Soy. Top Story - September 2020.
It is difficult to celebrate a heritage that is constantly rejecting you. You never felt Dominican enough. You always felt a need to overcompensate for some of your “undominican” behavior. You took classes to learn how to dance bachata and salsa. Still, your latinadad was constantly in question. You don’t look Dominican. You don’t sound Dominican. Those words were often spoken to you.
By Jay Cordero6 years ago in Families
