10 Lessons From 120 Days of Sobriety

In my last crazy month of being drunk, I found myself in the hospital, I’d even contemplated killing myself. These events made me realise alcohol was destroying my life. I needed to make a change before it was too late.

I had no idea what my new sober life had in store for me. One particular thing, I’d no longer be that obnoxious drunk. I had to quit for my own sanity. When deciding to stop drinking, you may think there are many negatives to being sober. I did as well.

I have now learned this is not true. A sober life is fulfilling and a lot of fun. Maybe you’re concerned about quitting drinking. The addictive brain is fantastic at telling us sweet little lies to keep us drunk all the time. It convinces you how boring your life will be without the sweet nectar. You need to shake this thought process and try, even for a brief moment.

Maybe over time, you will learn how great sobriety is as well? Ask yourself, why do you drink?

120 sober days later, here’s what I’ve learned;

1 — Reality sucks

But it sucks worse when you’re constantly hungover.

Alcohol has a malicious way of keeping you hooked. The little voice in your head keeps telling you to carry on drinking. You must stay intoxicated to escape this horrible life you’ve created for yourself.

So I’d drink to escape, wake up hungover and repeat. It made existence far worse. I kept drinking myself. Going lower and lower until I was in my own personal hell.

When deciding to give up drinking, I honestly thought my life would magically be better once the hangover had subsided. As if my problems would just disappear overnight.

Oh, how naïve.

Unfortunately, that’s not how life works. People use alcohol and other substances to escape from life’s issues. When I became sober, I had no idea how hard it would be. You mean I have to deal with my problems like an adult?

The sober mind thinks differently. You have time to process the issues at hand and attack them critically. Eventually, things will get better. Be aware though it doesn’t happen overnight; it is a slow process. But I have found there is a light at the end of the tunnel. Slowly the pieces of my life are coming together as I build from scratch in a new country.

2 — True friends stay

One of the main reasons I carried on drinking was the fear of losing friends. Through years of excessive drinking, I had convinced myself that consuming alcohol was the only way to be “fun”. If I were to quit drinking, all of my friends would suddenly disappear to the pub’s dark corners and refuse to speak to me.

In my short time sober, I have realised how ridiculous this notion is. Your true friends will stay by your side regardless. They like you for your personality; it doesn’t matter whether you have a drink or not.

You will also discover a whole group of new friends. As you spend less time hungover and more time enjoying life, you’ll even meet more people during fun activities (COVID dependent). You could try out various different activities through different mediums, virtual art class, anyone? At the very least, you may find a new passion.

I have now realised that I do not need alcohol to have fun or be liked.

3 — No-one actually cares

Giving up alcohol can seem like a drastic change to your life. Your mind keeps telling you how others will force you to drink or how they will now perceive you as boring. You will soon realise that no one actually cares whether you’re drinking or not.

Those close to you initially acknowledge your sobriety. It is soon forgotten as everyone carries on with their lives as usual. It is only a big deal to you because you are the one who’s experiencing your new sober life. Those who pester you to drink don’t really care about you. They only care about getting drunk.

“I don’t care if you drink, so why do you care if I don’t? “— Cait Flanders.

4 — It is a waste of money

If I could go figure out how much money had been pissed up the wall, I’d be left crying—what a waste of money and time.

I can never get this back.

5 — Anxiety

Anxiety would be an issue throughout my life. I used to drink to feel confident and remove the uncomfortable feeling deep inside of me. Of course, I couldn’t control how much I drank. I’d end up blacking out and awakening with the fear; my anxiety had now multiplied. Add a thumping headache into the mix. No wonder I needed to drink more to exist.

“Alcohol changes levels of serotonin and other neurotransmitters in the brain, which can worsen anxiety. In fact, you may feel more anxious after the alcohol wears off”.

Best pour myself another drink to remove my anxiety.

After a few months of sobriety, I have realised how alcohol actually heightened my perceived anxiety. It has become apparent that I wasn’t genuinely anxious; I was just in an uncomfortable situation.

6 — Drink dulled my senses

I’d drink to have fun or to stop feeling sad or anxious. I know you use alcohol for this very reason as well. Alcohol dulled any emotions I could have. Heck, I barely remember if I had any feelings. Patches of my life are missing, as is the money in my bank.

Four months later, I have created some incredible memories. I have a new positive outlook on life. The best part is I remember every single aspect of it. Sobriety has changed everything. I feel so much more alive.

In sobriety, you learn how to truly embrace your emotions.

7 — I have become more productive

I always wanted to be more productive. However, it is hard to be your best self when you’re forever hungover and sleep-deprived.

It feels terrific to awaken with a clear head, ready to tackle the day ahead.

8 — I am more creative

With the extra time to be productive, I have, in turn, become more creative. I’m slowly realising my passions. With time I will become a better writer, artist, and musician.

A passion for art is far more satisfying than a passion for bars and clubs.

9 — Health has become a priority

It is crazy to think about what alcohol is. You are willingly consuming poison every time you take a drink. Take a moment to think about how insane that is.

“Your body sees alcohol as a poison, or at least as something it doesn’t actually want inside it”. — Kevin Purdy.

Sober me is happier and healthier. I awaken every morning ready to begin a mellow yoga session followed by an intense workout. To finish off, I’ll have a healthy as fuck breakfast. I have overdosed on feel-good chemicals, got some great nutrients whilst building a stronger body and mind.

10 — Positivity

All of these changes have led to me becoming more positive. I have gone from feeling lost in the depths of my own hell. To awakening with a zest for life. Now I want to achieve my goals, improving my life any way I can.

Final thoughts

A sober life works best for me. It may not be the same for you, however. Everyone has different ways of dealing with life’s issues. Alcohol was my escape, I’d forever hide from life’s problems by using a drink.

Remember, you are in control of your own happiness, do not let alcohol tell you otherwise. Try to have a few weeks alcohol-free. See the difference it can make and work from there. The first step is the hardest. But trust me, it is worth it in the end.