Ugh, is it that day again?

This is for all the singles out there this Valentine’s Day. Take heart.

And, yes, I’m married and so, erm, why would I care anymore for those single on Valentine’s Day? Hear me out…

Firstly, full disclosure, I'm a hopeless romantic. I’m happy to admit it. But I'm that rare kind that is also prone to cynicism. A lot of cynicism. Not always a positive combination when it comes to showing affection on this particular day.

Every year I get a Valentine's card from Hubby and I get him one. I'll get a bouquet of flowers and even a gift. My first 'couple' Valentine's was amazing. And as I was treated to an utterly romantic day, I silently smacked all those other February 14th days of past in the face. But, as time passes, I tell Hubby to stop buying flowers because they're just too expensive. The usual $5 rose becomes $10. And whilst it can be argued that it's the sentiment behind the giving of roses, I'm lucky enough that Hubby buys me flowers regardless of what day it is. And, yes, the gifts given have been particularly lovely. Yet, surely that's what birthdays, wedding anniversaries and Christmas are for?

I say, leave Valentine's Day for the singles.

Isn't the point of the day, is to get a card signed with a question mark or flowers arriving with a note attached saying: "you're a bit of all right!"?Where the woman or man in question will then ponder who finds them attractive. It will give them a buzz, make 'em stand taller, brush a little more mascara on (true for some blokes too...) until they realize it's that dodgy looking guy from the post room, or the woman who always seems to wear the same cardigan/sweater, regardless of the weather.

For singleton’s out there it's probably the worst day of their lives. Another reminder that they're not with someone (or, worse still, they were and now, not). That their outstanding wit and charm was not so tempting. That as much as they primp and preen, they still can't meet that special someone. A day they hate knowing that whilst some are being swept off their feet, they'll be popping into the local supermarket, picking up a meal for one and a magnum bottle of champagne to deaden the neglect.

Believe me, I know it’s hard being single on Valentine's Day.

Suddenly, as soon as New Year resolutions are kicked to the curbside, heart shaped balloons appear and follow the singleton around a store where a corner is turned and they have to watch those in a relationship buying a card for their significant other. Some grabbing the first they see, others choosing with a lot more care, or those just getting one only because they think it will score them brownie points (and a bit of 'ow's your father). Depressing.

In the recess of a singleton's mind are they secretly hoping a card is being bought for them? Incidentally, February 14th is certainly not a day to buy a pack of cards and give them to all your friends in school. Does a first grader truly know about love? Some will argue it's an opportunity to celebrate the love of friendship. Great, wonderful, pick another day to acknowledge that - Valentine’s Day is about fancying the pants off someone - not having to give a card to a kid who's nose just won't stop running. It's not a day to be inclusive.

When I was single, I hated Valentine’s Day. I knew no one was going to send me a card, flowers or even a half-eaten box of chocolates. The day just sucked and I had to work...

I would spend hours in my room listening and lamenting to tragic love songs – all in the hope they would make me feel better. Yes, music is therapeutic but belting out Celine Dion’s, 'All By Myself', just highlighted that I was not only alone, but also a terrible singer…still am really <sigh>.

What makes it worse for all the single people out there on a day celebrating love, is how much it is in your face. The reminder to get a card by a teddy-bear holding a heart and a sappy look on its face declaring its love, the ‘hug in a mug’… Truth is, it's become so commercialized and expensive. Should a business make a profit on emotions?

And that says it all really. Are we not exploiting love?

Are we not making it an obligation to declare our love for someone on one particular day, when in fact, the declaration of love would be just as amazing if it happened on March 14 as it would February 14?

As I said at the beginning. To all the singletons out there this Valentine’s Day, take heart. Instead of mumbling bitter sentiments into that glass of champers, picking at the self-sent box of candy while waiting for the pizza to arrive (the meal for one will do for another night), here’s a play list to get you through the night.

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We’ll start strong to open up the airways and push through feelings of despondency, unrequited love etc.,

Celine Dion – All By Myself

Ramp up the heartache and loneliness for a few minutes more with Mariah. Let's really belt out the opening lines: "I'm thinking of you, In my sleepless solitude tonight":

Mariah Carey’s – My All

Swiftly followed by a classic:

Whitney Houston’s - All At Once

But, enough with the totally maudlin thoughts I say! Bring yourself ashore from 'drifting on a lonely sea'. Lets drop the champers and continue with a classic that get the hips gently gyrating and as the song suggests, forget all the pain (N.B. opening a bottle of red is optional):

UB40 - Red Red Wine

Next up, Celine. Again. Purely self-indulgent as I love her...but this is a great, get you up and dancing song with the key line of “you can win in this thing called ‘love’.

Celine Dion – That’s the Way It Is

Now your body is moving, your mind is rocking, let’s get your spirit soaring and shake off the doldrums, forget that feeling of you’ll never meet that special someone…

Lizzo - Good As Hell

Don't forget, we're still singing, so let's emphasize that “I am so awesome, you’d be lucky to have me” vibe with:

Kelly Clarkson – Stronger

Finishing strong with:

American Authors – Best Day of My Life

Because February 14th is a day, like every day, to celebrate how amazing you are, how it’s okay to be single, you rock, “everything is looking up, everybody up now. This is gonna be the best day of your life.”

BONUS TRACK: because it just makes me laugh and well, it may well resonate with you if you ever had to watch the person you love(d) get married to someone else.

Yvonne Fair – It Should Have Been Me

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Love is love - we don't need a day to show, wax lyrical and/or to celebrate it. It’s so important to love yourself, even just to like yourself. Shine from the inside and hey, maybe you’ll think that the dodgy looking person from the mail room is, actually, just whom you’ve been looking for.