Subtle Forms of Discrimination and Prejudice are All Too Real

I need to start by emphasizing that I absolutely love living as an expat in Baja, California, Mexico. I love it so much in fact that I invested a ton of time, energy, and money into becoming an official resident of the country. I feel like it is my second home. The vast majority of the Mexicans I have encountered and continue to encounter on a daily basis are wonderful people and ninety-nine percent of my interactions with them on a daily basis have been positive experiences. They have been nothing but respectful, kind, caring, and helpful, and have treated me exactly as they would a fellow Mexican. Yet, there are absolutely a tiny minority of people that either out of fear, prejudice, plain old hatred, or some combination of all of the above, have not. The types of discrimination and prejudice I have experienced are not overt or easily visible. There are no American flag burnings, or anti-American rallies, or no US citizens allowed zones, or anything that obvious to suggest such sentiment exists anywhere in the region where I live. In actuality, it is generally quite the opposite. Most Mexicans truly, genuinely like US citizens and want them to visit and even live in their country. They recognize our shared borders, shared values, and shared economic interests. The few that do not, practice a form of discrimination that is as subtle as it is pernicious. It is so subtle that it is barely noticeable. So subtle, in fact, that it is easy to question the reality of it, and many do. But I can tell you from personal experience it does exist, and it is real, and it takes many forms. From certain gas stations where paying for 30L never seems to quite fill your 30L tank, to resteraunts that bring tap water to your table when everyone else (Mexican) in the place gets bottled water, to the just barely audible whispers of "stupid gringo" heard after ordering coffee at a local cafe, to the sudden and baffling inability to understand basic Spanish even when you are sure what you said was said quite clearly, etc. and so on.

I know what you are thinking, how can you be certain these are really examples of discrimination and prejudice? Maybe everyone, Mexicans included, gets ripped off at those same gas stations, and maybe you just miscommunicated and actually ordered tap water, or maybe those whispers you heard were actually saying something else, or maybe your Spanish pronunciation is so bad or they are from a different region with a different accent, that they didn't actually understand what you said?" In truth, everytime something like one of the examples I mentioned happens, I ask myself those same questions. My immediate, gut reaction is to make every excuse in the book for why it was not actually discrimination or prejudice. And, sometimes, maybe even most times, I am wrong, and there is a perfectly logical, non prejudice based explanation, but I know I am not wrong everytime. I know that for certain. And, what I do not want to ever do is to begin to normalize these things. It is all too easy to fall into the trap of thinking that somehow you "deserve" it. After all, "I am a guest in their country, so maybe they have a right to treat me however they want." or "It's no worse than the sort of hazing one might get when joining a sports team or fraternity" or one of a million other excuses. I am not saying that every Mexican that has behaved in a prejudiced or discriminatory fashion toward me is some sort of raging racist or anti-American zealot. Probably a big portion of them are just naturally dickheads or assholes and say or do stupid shit all the time. But, the bottom line is that there is no excuse for discrimination or prejudice against anyone at anytime for any reason. None. The more people make excuses and justifications for anyone else including themselves being targets of discrimination, the easier it is for such behaviours to propogate and become normalized. We cannot let that happen. Ever.

For me and probably most people, these things are viewed as minor slights, inconveniences and annoyances that don't bother all that much. I give as good as I get, and most of the time I just laugh it off or ignore it. But, there are some people who do not react as well, and, even for me, over time it does wear on you. It does hurt. It does make you question the overall goodness of people, and sometimes, rarely, but sometimes, it makes you question the wisdom of your decision to move to a foreign country in the first place.

This is the real evil of discrimination and prejudice. The way it slithers into the core of the person being discriminated against, the way it eats away at their self worth, makes them question their beliefs, the wisdom of their choices, everything. In some ways, the more subtle the discrimination the more insidious it is.

Certainly it makes it much harder to detect and stop. It is relatively easy to point to someone at a rally with a sign that says "so and so go home" and understand that is prejudiced. It is is much harder to take a resteraunt to task for saying they did not have any seats available for dinner, even though they seated everyone else who arrived before and after you without reservations. Maybe those people did have reservations right? Maybe there was a system of calling ahead or online reservations that you just didn't know about right? Mayber there was....sigh.