Why we need to say no.

Photo by Linda Divisova on Unsplash

Empath is a growing term these days, more and more people are awakening to being an empath, and some might not even know what being an empath is. For those of you who don't, an empath is a person with the ability to tap into other beings' emotions. These other beings are usually humans or animals.

Now, this ability can be completely amazing, you are able to read people easily to see if they are lying to you, much like in the awesome tv show 'Lie To Me' except instead of reading micro expressions you feel, know, hear or see the emotions that someone else feels. (The two together would be a pretty mind-blowing ability if you ask me but that's on a different topic.) You could also find out if someone is happy, or reserved which could help you communicate with all different types of relationships including figuring out how your partner or spouse feels, if your business client is more open or if they need more convincing. It could help you mediate between coworkers and help you lead teams to success. It could also help you understand someone else's pain so that you can help them better.

There are so many benefits to being an empath, however, along with the benefits there are also side effects that can dim an empaths light and make them confused. Due to the fact that empaths can feel emotions, they can sometimes feel them too strongly and end up taking on more external emotions than they can handle. This can easily leave them feeling drained of energy on a daily basis, sad, depressed, angry and anxious. When an empath takes on too much external emotions it can wear down their protective aura, allowing more emotions and energy into their being which then pulls them out of balance, leaving them drained and feeling miserable. When an empath has holes in their aura, they become very anxious when talking to others and simply by just being around others. There are ways to clear that energy and those emotions as well as fix and strengthen the aura again. For more information on how to do that, visit www.furtherinlife.com and you'll be able to set up a free 30-minute case study session with me and we can discuss more about it.

However, for now I would like to focus in on one aspect that will help you prevent any of that from happening. It is one thing that we empaths end up finding very hard to do as we feel such a strong connection to others, and we feel like we are obligated to help others, no matter what.

Are you ready to figure out what it is? Good, keep reading below!

Photo by Frame Harirak on Unsplash

Dun-Da-Dun-Da! Self care. Yup, you saw right. You may be groaning, as some of you may already know that. But I'm going to take it one step further. What kind of self care? The same as the kind that's in the title. *Insert face palm here*

Now, I know that there are a hell of a lot of you that know saying no is important, but I also know that a lot of people don't know that, as well as the fact that I know that even though you 'know' that saying no is important, you don't implement it. Now if you do know and implement it, then amazing! That's completely awesome! But for those of you who don't then my dears we're going to have to get serious here for a moment.

Saying no is a fundamental for an empath. Why? Because we are already so overloaded by external emotions and energy that we burn ourselves out and then if we don't say no to something we know we don't want or don't have to do, we end up draining ourselves even more which then throws us into chaos and we end up coming down with chronic adrenal fatigue. That, is not fun, and it can take you months to get out of it. For those of you who feel like 'I don't matter, other people do' that's noble, don't get me wrong, but it is also idiocy. Think about it, if there is nothing left of you, then there is nothing left that you can do for others. If you are stuck in bed unable to move from adrenal fatigue, then when someone comes up and asks you to help them run a marathon for a disease, you can't move. You can't give money if the money cup is empty. You are the empty cup, there's nothing in there. So, if that is the case, then start implementing saying no so you don't get to that point. If you have a full cup, then you can easily give more to more people.

For those of you who are past that point, and still don't implement it enough, I understand where you're coming from too. 'I have a few things that I'm able to give, so I do, because I'm not good enough to have an easy life' Does that sound like you? If it does, that means that you don't hold yourself high enough to hold your boundaries and standards. People try to take advantage of you, and they do it constantly. When people take advantage of you, you sink back into feeling drained, abused and in the dark. You need to start seeing yourself as gold. You control your life, therefore you are the gold. By holding your standards and your boundaries you will be able to protect the gold that is you, and by protecting the gold that is you, you will be able to help people who actually deserve your help as well as, you'll be able to build up that good karma and interest to make your life better. Which in turn, allows you to do more for others that deserve it as well.

Everything is a cycle; it's how you use the cycle that makes your life a dream or a nightmare. If you give too much to those who don't need or deserve it, then all you'll get is being stuck in a loop of a nightmare. If you choose who you help carefully, as well living according to your boundaries, standards and how you feel in order to keep yourself going, then you'll be living in a dream.

Remember, you are gold, so protect that gold, for your sake as well as others.


Cassandra Lillico

Edited by Shari Lillico

Cassandra Lillico
Cassandra Lillico
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