Did my boyfriend kill himself on purpose or was it an overdose?

It's hard to talk about. But he may have swallowed something right before my very eyes that made him vomit his bottle of water. In retrospect I came out as a therapist defending our sex life even though my apartment water wasn't running correctly, reported to City of Toronto and I was feeling sick. especially at that point two days later when he was still sick from the ight he had visited my apartment and died two days later in the ambulance says his Baby's Mom who lives across the street from Tony and beside Tony's family.

I met Tony through Mollen. And while the world is under a pandemic I'm needing to write my emotions down because it is tough finding a therapist to listen to my life and what I'm about or not, and what I do with myself- to get help for Mollen's death and passing. And to receive help for Smurf who also passed away but this was in his apartment who was in chemo for facial tumours. Him and his racist dog Zeus who was abused by a black family and who hated black people. This little Jack Russell. It wasn't really his fault. Mollen had been using crack cocaine for two years. I do believe that was the only substance that he was taking. He was born in Granada or he said "He got dropped off there" Which is what made me confused about him in the beginning. He had lived with me for three weeks when I had frst got my apartment. He wasn't hiding any drug use per say that needed substance abuse control to my knowledge. But was it harm reduction? Where as unfortunately Smurf could have died from a heroin overdose I don't believe what Mollen was potentially taking to offset some physical trauma of being a Foundation worker and the effects on his lungs was street drug related I think it might have been found in something he was familiar with that he tried to be a combater people and bodily pain and malfunction with. That he would ingest and see as an aid but it wasn't. Which means he had killed himself in front of me. He had called someone to pick him up that night and I was picking him up off the ground to get him into that man's truck. Why was an ambulance not called?? I don't know. I can't answer that to this day.

Mollen's nickname was Neil. He was on the show Holmes on Holmes and he was a foundation worker. God Bless his soul. May it Rest in Heaven and may peace be to you both. The way I feel is that I have been through too much heart loss not to make a change and a difference in me.

I am exchanged at birth or adopted according to 23andme unless my adopted family is lying about genetics and heritage or decent.

My background is Irish, German-French, Slovakian, Chinese, and South African. What is my family? Irish, English, Scottish and my son He's his father's make-up and mine. So, this leaves us in an obvious predicament of lies deceit and betrayal. Where I was told as a young woman that my birth Mom died of HIV as a victim of Torture and I was shown pictures as well, I was also given a Birth Certificate once which was lost with a real name for me and with my Father's name on it. I am sad deep down that life has to go so far when I can't keep up.

I feel like posting tributes on Vocal of people's lives in passing that are poems or create writing styles that I could express myself better with more of an artistic flare but I have lost my motivation. I am just a music listener. Where I have started a BMus it means nothing without the paper. And I am tired of being used from one guy to the next, and now from landed immigrant people now as well as in the past to have to explain or to speak english for them or to do their online work for them while being mistreated like in possession, sexually, or even sometimes physically if he's a bad drunk.

Anyway, while I dream of making money through this lawsuit I have going on against this doctor I would like to finish my schooling and I really need life insurance at this time to even discuss or have future potential.