Childish, Emotionally Sensitive, and Grandiose!

In reading material by alcoholics, for alcoholics, the following statement was included — Doctors and psychologists after studying a group of problem drinkers made a statement that upset recovering alcoholics.

The statement was that while looking for personality traits common in a group of problem drinkers, they discovered they were childish, emotionally sensitive, and grandiose.

After the initial shock of the finding the group found that yes, that is the truth. As a woman in long-term recovery, I know this about myself to this day, even after many years of recovery.

Some may say it is human. Okay, maybe.

Here is how a portion of my day went. I swear when I don’t get enough of the support I need in a week. I was away from home for training for three days, and out of my routine. I came home tired and didn’t feel well.

My vehicle has been in the shop since August. I told my son I would be bringing his fiancés’ vehicle home to her on Saturday. I called the service place to find out the status of my vehicle.

Because we had a part on the recall list and other insurance to cover other costs, it was a surprise when the dealer said it would be 1,067.44 to pick up my vehicle. After I went over what I said, what she said, and was not nice on the phone, we went to pick up my vehicle.

The hubby asked that I be nice. I talked very little and when no one was there, I said, “Was that okay, I didn’t say f — — even once.” And he is shushing me.

I drove his car with our passenger, and he drove mine to check it out.

When I got to the car I said, John did this as we were driving in Colorado, he gave the mountains the finger and said, I am never coming back here again. I then demonstrated that by pointing at the car dealer's window before we left.

Childish? Yes. Emotionally sensitive? Yes. Possibly grandiose?? Yes. Okay, they are right, and it doesn’t seem to matter how long I have been in recovery. The good news is I can laugh about it and I don’t have to stay in that mess!

I still have to talk to a few more people about getting reimbursed for our costs. The other insurance told us we shouldn’t have to pay more than $100. Well, it is a lot more.

At this point, I want to trade my truck in for a new vehicle. I do not want any more vehicle troubles and this one can get more as it has very few miles but has other issues my husband has run into when reading about the possible problems associated with my truck. It is a 2016 Dodge eco diesel.

Too much truck for me. There is the grandiosity. So many luxuries. It has a button to push for the vehicle to lower when getting in and out. The seats heat and cool. There is a nice big screen that shows the backing up. Let’s just say it is loaded.

Did I mention the previous owner lived where the roads aren’t salted so there is no rust!

It will be a difficult decision once I drive it again. We will be out of town for another couple of days before I drive it. The hubby is suggesting maybe a Jeep. Let me know what you think if you have an opinion on a Jeep that can pull 3,000 pounds.

I am a woman in long-term recovery, who hasn’t found it necessary to drink alcohol or take drugs in 43 years. I do have an occasional outburst that is childish, emotionally sensitive, and grandiose. Thankfully, this is not my normal condition.

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First published by Mercury Press on medium.com

Mercury Press