2020 in Review: Reflection

I have to say this year has been one of the weirdest years ever for a lot of people including myself. It has been a complete roller coaster that has sucked the life out of everyone both mentally and physically. It’s still hard to comprehend, even when it is the time of the New Year again.

During the beginning of the pandemic, many college students had to evacuate campuses during the end of March of this year to go home. It was very stressful for a lot of students, especially students who couldn’t leave. Thankfully, many students (including myself) were able to leave and students who had to stay on campus were given the help and resources they needed. However, it was still stressful for everyone when there was obviously a global pandemic of a deadly coronavirus no worries me knew anything about at the times. It doesn’t feel safe anymore to go back in person or anywhere in public for that matter for now.

Sadly, not many students in college are taking this situation seriously, and it’s still putting people’s health at risk. Some friends I know from school still do not take the virus seriously, thinking they are invincible and can do whatever they want and go wherever. Even seeing their social media posts about them going out during this time makes me cringe. It is so ridiculous and selfish to see that, while hearing at least 3,000+ people die each day in the U.S. from Covid-19.

Since the beginning of the pandemic, mental health became a concern for many people. Many stresses people experienced included hearing a lot of political bias news from both sides of the political spectrum about things that were never about politics in the first place, numerous deaths and cases of Covid-19, and the things that were going on in the Social Justice Movement. Another concern from this pandemic was the fact that many people who were forced into quarantine had to deal with domestic violence, harassment, assault, abuse, and worse of all: isolation through it all. Even with a global pandemic, people in quarantine with situations like this in mental and physical ways was also something that put their lives in danger. Despite all of this, this pandemic was also a time of reflection for everyone.

Since coming back home in March of this year from school and being in quarantine for 9 months now, I learned a lot more about myself than I have before, reflecting on myself to learn more about who I am. These are the lessons I learned this year and in general from the past:

1. Anxiety

I never realized how bad my anxiety has been growing up, but I never experienced this much anxiety during this pandemic before like everyone else. It’s horrible to feel depressed and super self-conscious about it from time to time, and face criticism for it. However, I have learned that having anxiety is okay, because you can get help for it. People always make it as if anyone with anxiety is an outcast or a complete weirdo. To me that doesn’t make sense nor does that help anyone. Anxiety is a real thing, and a lot of people struggle with it, especially now. It’s going to be okay and there is help.

2. Compassion

I learned that it’s a good thing to give yourself some compassion, even while giving others compassion as well. It can be hard when you and other people have many different expectations for yourself, but it is important to remember to give yourself compassion and not expect too much. It’s unhealthy to expect too much, because not giving yourself compassion could hurt you and everyone else around you (overworking and not taking care of yourself for example). Having compassion for yourself for the right reasons can teach you about the importance of self-love and self-care. Do your best and never ignore what you are capable of. You are more capable than you think you are.

3. Toxicity

Being in a toxic environment is always horrible, especially when it involves people who want to hurt you and other people. It can hurt you, bring you down, drain you, and other worse circumstances like making you question everything from your personality to your actions to your routine to your existence. Being with the right people who care about you and love you is the greatest thing, because they can save your life. Obviously, nobody is perfect, including myself and others. However, it’s okay to distance yourself from toxic people, because it is really sad to get used to more people like them without realizing it throughout your life. At the end of the day, any toxic environment is still toxic, and many toxic people are secretly calling out for help too.

4. Gratitude

Practicing gratitude each day is really important, especially when it can be hard to feel happy and not stress out about everything. Gratitude can make you happier and less stressed, and can remind you to be more thankful. Some of the things we take for granted are only available for a certain amount of time, so enjoy them while you can for now. This year, a lot of the things we took for granted are not available for now. Hopefully, they will be again when things are safer.

5. Worth

You are worth it. People can say what they want and be super mean about it, but you yourself know who you are. Believe in yourself, even if you feel like complete garbage. Remember that you have control over your life, even if things don’t feel that way. As Christina Aguilera says in her song, “You are beautiful, no matter what they say, cause words can’t bring you down.” I read this website today that explains very well about the importance of everyone’s worth. This is the link to it, and it has helped me myself too: https://www.blurtitout.org/2019/03/14/letter-life-feels-pointless/. Never change who you are and never let anyone define you for something you know you are not.

6. Hope

Even if things feel hopeless, remember that there is always light at the end of the tunnel. Even if you have to find something to be optimistic about throughout the pessimism, do it. If that will help you to keep going, do it and let it continue to keep you going. It will be okay.

7. Passion

Doing what makes you happy can make other people happy in the long run. Be yourself. You never know how much of a difference you will make for others with doing what you love and showing who you are. Be the inspiration you want to be.

8. Loneliness

Being in isolation was tough overall. However, I learned that it was actually okay to be alone for some time. Needing some alone time ended up becoming a blessing in disguise, where I decided to take care of myself, relax, and reflect on myself. Because of this, I have learned more about myself and used what I learned to try and help others during this time too. It was a good break from society in general.

9. Intuition

Finally, I want to talk about the importance of trusting your intuition, and making that a habit. Trusting your intuition (or your gut) is important, even if it might not make any sense for some reason. I learned this too when in college, and it has helped me out so many times to do the right thing. Seriously, your intuition can even save your life or someone else’s, so listen to it.