"What are you doing?"
"Nuthin' just sittin'. "
"Sitting is not nothing."
"You asked and I told."
"Do you want to watch a movie?"
"I don't like watching on my phone."
"Who said anything about a phone? Come over."
**
Barry texts <I'm outside, open the door>
Len replies <just a sec>. He opens his door, and in comes Barry.
"You can select between two movies, Barry," Len says, grinning.
"Why two and not three?"
"Don't be your usual contrary jerk-off! Choose! Carrie, or Halloween H2O."
"H2O, for sure. Love Jamie Lee!
Len's laptop is open, and images of Carrie and Halloween H2O movies are on it. The coffee table has snacks laid out to eat.
"Whatcha got to eat?" Barry asks, ignoring the coffee table spread.
"Rolo candy and Cheetos. Iced tomato juice, like blood. The tomato juice with the orange Cheetos is like grilled cheese with tomato soup."
"I never liked that combination."
"You will change your mind tonight."
"Len, I'm twenty-four, and Cheetos just give you orange fingers."
"Look! This is our food for the movie! You eat it like this. First three of the Cheetos, dip your fingers in the tomato juice and lick it off, then pop one chocolate-caramelly Rollo in your mouth. I guarantee that you will love it."
Barry notices the laptop.
"I'm not watching Jamie Lee on your laptop."
"It's easier to see her up close," Len mumbles.
Barry glares at him. "I told you NO before I came over."
"Yeah, I heard that," Len chuckles. "Relax you, uptight bonehead. We're using my sixty-five-inch screen, okay?"
"Gross, look at your fingers!"
About the Creator
Andrea Corwin
🐘Wildlife 🌳 Environment 🥋3rd°
Pieces I fabricate, without A.I. © 2024 Andrea O. Corwin
https://atmospherepress.com/interview-with-andrea-corwin/
Instagram @andicorwin
Threads @andicorwin
X - no holds barred! @andiralph
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Easy to read and follow
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Comments (8)
Nothing like good natured banter between friends 😃.
This was perfect, funny and was very easy to visualise, as so many have already said! Fun entry to the challenge, Andi, well done!
A very fun piece! Great dialogue poem! Appreciated the picture of rolos too
You've created real, flawed, entertaining characters through the dialogue. Strange combo of snacks, too, which is always fun for me to read about. Hope you had as much fun writing as I had reading it. Fun!!! 😋
good
I gagged at the mention of tomato juice 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 I'm not a fan of tomatoes hahahahaha. Loved your poem!
I can really picture this playing out so clearly.
The details about the movie choices, snacks, and the unique way Len suggests enjoying them bring the scene to life. The dialogue captures the essence of their relationship and showcases their contrasting personalities. It's a fun and entertaining exchange that leaves the reader curious about what will happen next. Well done, and have a nice day!