Take Me to Your Leader

“Take me to your leader,” the alien said.

You gotta be kidding! The thought filled me with dread.

Come looky here, it’s Niagara Falls!

A natural wonder that’s sure to enthrall.

Or perhaps the Grand Canyon!

Or these trees they call banyan.

“Take me to your leader,” the alien said.

That’s so obtuse, it made me see red.

A man-made wonder, the tower called Eiffel!

Surely that stirs the heart, a joy you can’t stifle.

Or the Great Wall of China,

Now what could be finer?

“Take me to your leader,” the alien said.

But there’s much more to see as o’er the mountains we sped.

The Sydney Opera House, now there is a treasure.

Surely its grandeur gives you great pleasure.

Or this peak they call Everest!

The tallest around, it’s still the best ever.

“Take me to your leader,” the alien said.

“Oh lordy,” I thought. “Think I’ll go back to bed.”

Come see the Amazon, a jungle so vast

That you cannot walk through it, not even past.

Or the great pyramid at Giza

Now there is a pleaser!

“Take me to your leader,” the alien said.

“I am so famished, I need to be fed.”

So I took him to the leader. “Ah ha! Now some lunch.”

He bit off his head and started to munch.

“We eat leaders for breakfast,

They make a fine repast.”

“I’m from the planet Anarchia,” the alien said.

“And leaders for us are our daily bread.”

“Now show me more sights now that I’ve had my snack,”

“Your planet is lovely,” as his lips gave a smack.

So I showed him more sights and he went on his way.

I wonder if he will return here some day.

So if you’re a leader and have a swelled head,

Beware of the alien, he might eat you dead.

More of my Poems at Vocal

The Ugly Duckling – Oct. 20, 2021 – the classic fairy tale told as a poem in the style of Edgar Allen Poe's The Raven.

Little Red Riding Hood – Oct. 22, 2021 – the classic story told in the style of Alfred Noyes's poem The Highwayman

Odds Bodkins – Nov. 10, 2021 – A lipogram is a story that is missing a common symbol usually found in writing. This rhythmic madrigal is such.

Casey at the Crease – Dec. 1, 2021 – a poem patterned after Ernest Lawrence Thayer's Casey at the Bat, but about hockey! I am Canadian after all!

Dear Mousie - April 14, 2023 - a retelling of Robbie Burns's poem To a Mouse in modern English.