I Loved you

I loved you

That’s a hard concept to grasp when he never knew

When you’re simply a friend

In the background when it comes to romance

In their fleeting thoughts of love or like you know the thought of you never crosses their mind

But, remember, I loved you

“Loved” you

Because then I saw you

True, I’d always seen you

The best and the worst parts

But I saw you change; I saw you

And I wish I could have loved that change

Maybe things would have stayed the same

But I saw it in your eyes, a desire, desire for everyone and anyone who breathed

You loved everyone and me...

I couldn’t breathe

Couldn’t believe

How love could dissolve into this feeling

Like the crushing weight of unrequited love that you spoke in you’re heart but not with your lungs

Like the feeling of falling and hitting the earth, wondering why you fell when your landing wasn’t known first

Feeling so naive

Like I shouldn’t have explored, let my foot hover forward, falling headlong into the void

That’s why I won’t

I won’t love in the way I loved

I held back, but I didn’t hold back enough, no not in my heart

So I won’t love with my heart, only my head, until I trust you’ll catch me *hopefully I’m not naive to say this *

Loving young is a trap, because people will change

So I will love when I have my head on straight

And maybe one day things will change

Maybe my head and heart will feel the same thing

Maybe I’ll venture to the edge of this cliff again

Hovering my foot just above the edge

Falling headlong to the one I trust

This “loved” will not remain

My love, will love away any pain

“Could you be the one?” I’ll question again

The one who could make me love again?