For Becky

There was a night that I sat at a table-

-alone-

with a glass of sherry in front of me.

(Nasty stuff, that cheap sherry.

But I don’t drink much, and what did I know?)

I sat and thought about the tired,

sad,

messy business my life had become.

I briefly considered walking down the road-

-any road-

until I found someone else out wandering,

and I could rest my head on their shoulder and warm my hands in theirs.

But, I didn’t.

I wasn’t as brave as you.

I didn’t want anyone to know how soul-seared and brain-bogged I felt.

The sad stayed in my pocket,

-wadded up with the gas station and Dairy Queen receipts-

and dragged my heart down

down

down.

I wish I had been as open as you.

I wish I'd found more courage.

I wish I’d known that the feeling would pass.

I wish I’d thought of sharing it-

-airing it out and drying it off.

I’m sitting here this morning,

instead,

remembering that me and so proud of this you

and sending you light.

Shine.

Shine on forever.

~

Comments welcomed.