Beautifully Conflicting Things

Things that are

Seemingly in contradiction:

How can I, the consummate

“Happy Atheist”

Be (voluntarily and willingly) going

To a place of worship?

I believe in Universe,

The things that work

Without reason, there is no

Plan, no omnipotent/omniscient being,

How else can you explain

War, poverty, children hurting?

Oh no no, it makes so much more

Sense if there is Nothing, no one…

But then, what is this?

Feelings where there was numbness

For so very long, Alone.

Can I experiment scientifically

With God?

Another curiosity…

If I do this, then what?

If I pray, meditate,

Stare up at the stars and

Wait for a sign, a reason

To Believe...

What, then, of Faith?

I lost mine

So very long ago,

(and honestly, after everything

It had done to me,

was glad to see it go).

Now, I stand at a precipice

Wondering where to find meaning

For things that seem

Mystifying…

Like your eyes:

Are they blue? Green?

An in-between?

No photo can capture their

Color, and I can feel inside

A letting go, a letting be

Despite my need to

Describe/define

Everything.

They just are,

A part of you–

Yet another indescribable entity,

Full of beautifully conflicting things.

Echoes, maybe a little like me–

I think I’ve always had

Several split personalities,

Quadrophenia (at the least).

If the soul can be seen

Through the eyes, truly,

Yours is ever-shifting and

So very thoughtful, changeable.

It’s incredible to witness

Your evolution, inspiring,

And I’m changing in your

Shadow, so gentle and

Demanding, this

Sacred Metamorphosis:

Currently cocooned, edges undefined,

Becoming something

Extraordinarily

Unexpected…