I'm learning you exist,
learning I exist,
and I am happy,
but you keep changing.
I'm not sure I can keep up.
The other kids are mean,
and I'm hiding from you in books these days.
I dream of elsewhere.
I'm making friends, but I feel alone.
"Can you have depression at 11?"
I think I need help.
I know I need help.
"Mom, I don't want to be alive anymore."
What if I bury myself in a to do list?
What if I bury myself in a boy?
What if I move to Cleveland?
I didn't have friends before, but I do now.
Hello again, world. Aren't you full of possibilities?
I'm going to be a writer.
What if I move to New York?
What does it take to put a life on pause?
What does it mean to love someone?
What if they leave?
What if I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be right now?