Try this new approach for a better 2023!

Have you ever done New Year's resolutions? You might have noticed that they almost never work,

or at least only for a couple of months. Then after, let's say six months, the good intentions begin to fade and we start to forget about them.

I want to give you a completely new approach on how to prepare for the next year. Whatever goals and ambitions you have for 2023, let's talk about the missing piece between you and your goals.

First, let's take a closer look at why things often don't work out until the end of the year. A general answer I hear a lot is a variation of: "Life got in the way."

A hectic schedule prevents us from preparing meals, we choose sleep over a workout, we realize that we have to save up money due to an unpredictable economy and the first things to go are our hobbies, our subscriptions, and "non-essential" expenses. In the end, you could tell yourself that at least you tried and that counts for something, right?

Well, yes maybe, but that wasn't the goal, was it?

Feeling uncomfortable yet?

Take a breath because it's not your fault. You are not the bad guy here. As a matter of fact, your mindset is!

Why curating a winning mindset should be the first order of business in 2023

A winning mindset should help you be more resilient toward the ups and downs in life. It should enable you to control how you perceive events and navigate your emotional life. A key component of this kind of mindset ist the ability to work with perspectives.

'Perspective' is the most valuable good in the world! And I'll tell you why.

I have this theory that no matter how you spin it, 'perspective' is the ultimate currency that trumps everything. It's the gold standard that translates into any other part of your life. If you have perspective, you'll always have the upper hand.

In every situation, there are between 360 and an infinite number of different perspectives and it's up to you to choose the one you like. How cool is this?

All the money in the world is worth next to nothing if all you see are problems. A person with almost no money could be waking up every morning with a huge smile on his face, ready to turn any obstacle into an opportunity. The only difference between those two people is their mindsets.

If you are single or in a relationship, if you are a spiritual person or believe in nothing, if you are naturally talented or have two left hands, your ability to shift your perspective and acquire new ones ultimately decides about your growth and eventually your happiness.

Here is a personal example:

I recently skimmed through my old journals and found a list of goals and resolutions for 2019. Until today, I haven't even reached half of my goals from that list. I couldn't help but feel bad about myself.

In a matter of seconds, the negative self-talk started. No matter how I tried to comfort myself, everything began to sound like an excuse compared to the written proof of my "failure" right in front of me.

I gotta be honest, it took me a moment but eventually, I managed to regain a healthy perspective on that list and the dark clouds above my head disappeared. Just like that.

Relief in two steps:

#1 Stop counterfactual thinking

Counterfactual thinking is going over every detail of a situation that didn't turn out the way you wanted it to, over and over again. You keep noodling over what you could have done differently.

From my experience, 99% of most problems can be traced back to the feeling of not being in control. Nobody likes that.

The irony is that the path to reclaiming control is by learning how to let go. It's over, it's done. You can't go back, life moves on and all that's left to do now is to focus on your here and now. Or if you want to hear it from a famous stoic philosopher:

Every man's life lies within the present; for the past is spent and done with, and the future is uncertain. - Marcus Aurelius

Letting go sounds a lot easier than it is. Trust me, I know. But the next tip might be of great assistance in mastering this task.

#2 Start learning about building a resilient mindset

You have probably heard of "smart goals" or other cool techniques, like breaking down bigger goals into smaller goals, starting with the task you like the most, etc.. However, we often fail to stick to those plans anyways. We drop out as soon as life gets busy. A resilient mindset, however, represents the solid foundation on top of which we build for the long game.

So, what if we began to work on a winning mindset first instead of struggling throughout the process?

Educating ourselves about the ability to work with perspectives and therefore forge a powerful mindset is like growing the roots of a giant tree. The stronger the roots, the more likely your chances of success.

Building a mindset takes time and requires a combination of theory and practice. The good thing is, nowadays, there are endless resources on this. Most bookstores devote whole sections to this topic. There are apps, youtube channels, podcasts, masterclasses, and more, and it's completely up to you what medium serves you best. In the end it's your journey.

Here are some resources I found helpful:

• Apps: Calm, Headspace, Centr (also has a great meditation section with voices like Chris Hemsworth)
• Books: Ego is the Enemy, Build for Tomorrow: An Action Plan for Embracing Change, Adapting Fast, and Future-Proofing Your Career, The Daily Stoic, Atomic Habbits, How to Win Friends and Influence People

• Journal: 6-minute Success Journal, Klarheit Planner, Creator Journal,

🪴 Our minds are like a garden. It needs to be weeded and maintained in order to cultivate a fertile ground where new things can grow.

Do you want to make sure that your mindset can grow strong and tall? ... Then you might have to get your hands a little dirty.

Learning about self-awareness and mindfulness is a great basis in order to start weeding out your garden from unnecessary or harmful pests and parasites. Practicing self-awareness is one of the most effective tools you need to maintain a healthy and diverse garden (or mind) throughout your whole life.

It can be as simple as focusing on your own breath for a couple of minutes, writing down your thoughts in a journal, or following the instructions of a guided yoga video on youtube.

For example: Try the 4-7-8 breathing exercise! Close your mouth and quietly inhale through your nose to a mental count of four. Hold your breath for a count of seven. Exhale through your mouth, making a whoosh sound for a count of eight. Repeat the process three more times for a total of four breath cycles. Now compare how you felt before and after doing this.

Here is another easy exercise I like that helps kicking off your mindset journey:

Energy GIVERS vs. Energy TAKERS

Take two pieces of paper, or if you use a journal write on separate pages. On the first page, I want you to list ENERGY GIVERS. Randomly list down all the things that help you feel more replenished, energized, and more like yourself (even just for a moment).

For me, this could look like this:

• Waking up early
• Long hugs
• Work out at least 3x a week
• Outdoor activities
• Interacting with animals
• Journaling
• Meditating
• Writing/being creative
• Coffee
• Sunshine
• Playing with Blue (our dog)
• Visualization
• Reading
• Yoga
• Drinking enough water
• Viking showers (ice cold water at the end of a warm shower for at least 10secs)

Feel free to list as many as you like. Now you write your ENERGY TAKERS on a seperate piece of paper or the next page, for example:

• Mindlessly scrolling through Social Media
• Wondering what other people think
• Sweets
• Too much coffee
• Spending time with people who complain a lot
• Inconsistent sleep pattern
• Setting unrealistic goals
• Unclear boundaries
• Going-going-going without rest
• Too much screen time

Now, when you're done, you take the page with your energy takers, rip it out of your journal and throw it away. Feels good right?

Don't focus on outcomes

Focussing on outcomes is a toxic way to look at your journey to a happier and more succesfull life. It'll only leave you frustrated and does your overall journey no good. Marcus Aurelius said:

Concentrate every minute on doing what's in front of you with precise and genuine seriousness, tenderly, willingly with justice.

So by the end of this year you won't focus on a list of goals but rather take a proud look at how far you've come and choose a perpective of gratitude.

My point is: Achieving your goals is a marathon and not a sprint and with a resilient mindset you'll become unstoppable.

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Let me know in the comments if you found this helpful and I'm sure I'll write a lot more on similar topics.

I appreciate everyone who takes the time to read my stories and articles or comment on my videos and photos on instagram. I love this community we are building and I can't wait to see everyone win.

📱@moritzxbauer