Navigating the Pitfalls of Positive Affirmations

I have always believed in the power of positive affirmations. My problem has been to understand the right way to start them. There are times in life when nothing seems to be working. Times like these push you to try new things. I am in a phase like that right now, hence an excellent opportunity to explore positive affirmations.

Affirmations are declarations to instill positivity and confidence. Repetition of affirmations enables individuals to reshape their thoughts and beliefs. Affirmations are not a one-stop solution for all miseries. It is an efficient way to maintain our mental hygiene and be optimistic about life.

I have always been a fan of public speakers discussing the law of attraction. My favorite has been Dr Wyane Dyer. I am reading his book "Ask and It is Given" and hoping to learn more about the law of attraction. A few months back, a friend told me about Louise Hay. She is a massive advocate of positive Affirmations. The life story of Louise Hay is inspiring. Her content motivated me to give affirmations an honest try.

Why am I writing?

According to Louis, affirmations are relaxing and self-assuring. Starting the practice of positive affirmations could be energy-draining. In this article, I want to write some pitfalls of the practice and its associated learnings.

I like dissecting self-development techniques before jumping onto a new one. What better way to analyze than publishing a blog in the public domain?

Let's start by targeting the elephant in the room. A lot of us don't believe in affirmations. Louis Hay has an answer for this. Our brain produces more than 5,000 thoughts every day. Any idea that is not a present or past reality is an affirmation.

• If you think you are not intelligent enough, it's a negative affirmation.

• If you believe you deserve a promotion, it's another negative affirmation.

• If you feel you have enough capital to start a business, it's a positive affirmation.

If you don't believe in affirmations, it's a negative affirmation. Skeptics of affirmations should see their denial as an affirmation itself.

There are three significant pitfalls with affirmations.

1. Attachment to outcomes

The first problem is attachment to outcomes. You are bound to have expectations while repeatedly thinking uplifting thoughts. Pain and disappointment are inevitable if affirmations don't bring the desired results. Something like this happened to me recently.

I have been fighting a legal battle for over six years. Affirmations have been a part of my daily routine for the last six months. My practice created an expectation for something positive. Instead of a positive outcome, an unfortunate event was waiting for me. It was a miscommunication between me and my lawyer, and we missed a necessary court hearing. There was guilt and fear. I spent many sleepless nights fearing the worst. Fear fought fatigue and pain, which brought the practice of affirmations to a halt.

2. The Cognitive Struggle

The second pitfall is the "Cognitive Struggle". Existing beliefs wire our brains. Past traumas change our brain wirings, which forces us to question positive affirmations. To understand why our brain works like that, read "Thinking Fast and Slow" by Daniel Kahneman. In short, our past traumas hijack our cognitive skills and belittle the value of positive thinking. I have written many articles inspired by this book. Links are below.

3. Energy Drain

Due to the cognitive struggle, it takes a lot of energy to stay positive. Our negative patterns take the upper hand when results don't follow the expectations. Due to low mental strength, more things start failing.

Earlier in the article, I discussed an unfortunate event in my legal matter. The impact of the event created issues at my workplace. I argued with a colleague. There were no real issues, but low energy levels created a cloud that affected my sanity levels. I like to take ownership of my mistakes; hence, I apologized for my behavior, noted my learnings, and moved on.

What to do?

If there are so many challenges, shouldn't we stop positive affirmations? I won't. In this section, I will explain why. Being positive is not a choice. It's the only option. We face difficulties because that's what life is. Both hell and heaven are here in the present. Traumatic experiences wire our brains to think in a pessimistic manner. You cannot change those wirings in a day or two.

Louise Hay's content inspires this article. She often talks about these pitfalls. It is going to be difficult. It is not easy to change your brain wirings based on past beliefs. The only way out is Self Love. Ask yourself – Do you love yourself? Can you forgive yourself for committing mistakes? I forgave myself for the blunder I did with my court case.

Henry Ford said - "Whether you think you can or you think you can't—you're right.". If that's true, isn't it better to visualize what we can over what we can't?

Let's accept it. We are pessimistic beings. Hence, we all are experts in generating negative thoughts. Practicing positive affirmations demands deep introspection.

How do you start the practice of positive affirmations?

The starting point is to challenge our negative thought patterns with positive ones. Don't psyche yourself out by trying to do this all day. I tried and failed. It's an energy-draining process at the start.

Start small. Fifteen minutes a day sounds like a good start. You can use guided videos from Louise Hay. I use a customized form of the 3-6-9 method of manifestation to practice affirmations. Let me know if you want to hear about this personalized version of the 3-6-9 methodology.

Set a goal and build discipline. Self-doubt will come, but handle it with love and care. Give yourself 45 days of consistent practice, and then take a call. If you want to stop the trial after 45 days, ask yourself - What's better? Visualizing positivity or wrapping yourself under the blankets of anxiety.

Conclusion

Why are kids always happy? They don't have past experiences that can impact their happy thoughts. As we grow up, life realities kill the child within us. It's time to question these wirings and visualize a life full of happiness and peace.

Let me know what you think of it.

Thanks

Tarun