If my life was scripted.

They say our lives have been planned out from day one, there is a blueprint we all follow but it doesn't necessarily have to live by the blueprint. Changes can be made, it could be altered but what happens when it gets extremely difficult to change what has been written?.

What happens when it gets had to alter what has been planned? I wake up every morning with my day already planned ahead. You could say subconsciously I had already written it, no one plans a bad day ahead, no one wakes up and chooses to loose their smile. The bad things that happens happen unexpectedly, life has proved to not be a bed of roses.

I have learnt to view life differently, instead of the bright colors I see the black and white, if I wrote my life it would be roses and lilies but I'm not in charge. The plans have been laid out but I don't know what happens next, whoever wrote it is probably looking down and waiting for whatever is to happen to happen. We all want happiness, we all want to smile but that's what we want, it's not what life has installed.

If this life was taking from a book then the author I say is very much sadist, the trials and tribulations that we go through everyday. If my life was taking from a book then I would like a do over, I planed happiness, joy and peace not what life is offering. If only life offered me something else or gave me options I could pick.

Everyday I wake up and I commit my day into the hands of the creator, hoping the day goes has planned. Hoping that depression takes a break but it doesn't always go as planned there is always a set back. If my life was a story then when does this story end cause I no longer have interest in it or can we tear off the pages and start a fresh.

That feeling of looking in the mirror and you no longer recognize yourself, they say our lives have been written and planned from the start then who added the pain, the tears, the broken hopes and dreams? I request a do over, did I give the seal of approval or I don't get to approve?.

Life throws you from a great height and expects you to stand on your two feet, I'm sorry to announce that I landed on my face and can no longer get back up. Give me the pen for a moment, let me at least draft out a page, give me moment to change and rewrite some things. Who holds the blueprint? Can I reconstruct something else? Who wrote the script, the Acts and scenes seem to carry loads of pain and if a resolution is not provided at the end I might not be able to carry on.

Let's close the curtains for a moment, let's go back and reflect cause the pages need amendment. I do not approve of what's written, if my life was a script then it is a poorly written one.Start writing...