Common Sense Living Prevents Burnout For Me

Feasting on Empathy Burnout Is Real by Snigdha Sukhavasi

And my heart, mind, and soul did a triple summer salt without the rest of my body. 

It can be so tiring to be the understanding one always, the one who reads the room first, who checks in before anyone checks on you, and who somehow ends up holding space for everyone else’s feelings before you have even had a chance to sit with your own. Snigdha Sukhavasi

Yes, it’s tiring to be the one who uses common sense as a tool. The one who is aware of life, living, and the hell raging in our world, then lives wisdom and common sense accordingly. Reading this piece, I realized that I wasn’t as smart as everyone thought I was. I think with depth, using kindness as a tool. I am aware, don’t like pain, use common sense and wisdom in all areas of my life, not to repeat hell. I know balance must be paid, so I live life with more understanding. Any understanding of life will accommodate simple, but good living and prevent any repeat of hell. 

Yes, I know hell!

When you are always the one holding space and rarely the one being held, the relationship trains you into a role without either of you noticing. You become the container, not the one allowed to be messy, needy, or sad out loud. Snigdha Sukhavasi

Being too kind, too understanding, too patient, too loving, too forgiving, too accommodating, too damn good, you become inhuman. People you care about begin to treat you without regard, care, or feeling because you are strong and can handle everything. You have the day, second, minute, hour, and moment to fix their inferno, while yours keep burning out of control. Which they don’t ask about. No one asks if you are ok. No thoughts are sent your way. 

If you feel things deeply, you already know this in your body, no study required. Snigdha Sukhavasi

So that’s why I can read emotions and often make sensible life decisions for myself, passing many of life’s tests. Yes, I feel everything from depths I often can’t understand. I can also feel the pain of animals and a tree that is being chopped down for greed. So that’s why I also unconsciously began practicing pain management early, and feeling from a certain depth grants you wisdom too. 

The tiredness that builds from this rarely looks like tiredness from the outside. Snigdha Sukhavasi

When I’m tired and realize I am alone and can rely only on me, common sense refuels my body, heart, mind, and soul. Then I make sensible decisions to save myself. 

Nothing about any of this means you are broken or bad at relationships. Snigdha Sukhavasi

Every human on the planet will find themselves running on Empty with no one around to assist with a refill. In contrast, they have lived a life refilling everyone who needs it. This is when life demands that you put yourself first. In that corner, you will be alone. No one will be there, so that’s when life gives you no choice. You can start living for yourself, or stop living!

If you are always the one carrying everyone’s weight, I wonder who is carrying yours. And if no one comes to mind right away, maybe sit with that for a second before you answer the next person who needs you. Snigdha Sukhavasi

I still carry someone’s weight. But I ensure that they carry mine too. This is where life will put many of us, because of cruel and thoughtless humans who take, and take, and take, unaware that balance must be paid. The ones unaware of balance will always live uneven lives, because balance will step in and take what’s due. 

Those who are aware of balance and pay their dues are more in control of their lives and live well, too. 

Snigdha, thank you from the end of my heart for this piece. Every human on this planet must read this, because all of us will get here. But go there with common sense, knowledge, love, and wisdom. These are tools that can and will heal and help.