Capturing Life's Treasures

Introduction

Just over a year ago, I lost my mother. Her health declined rapidly in early 2023 until her passing in May. As a single mother, she raised two kids and faced life's challenges like a true warrior.

As the older brother and general fixer for the family, I took the responsibility to write my mother's eulogy—we made it a Service of Remembrance. My heart was heavy. As I reflected on the past, I remember my mother having a tough life and making so many sacrifices to care for her children. Though we were poor, we had her love, her strength, and her perseverance that always guided us.

Writing about my mother, my hero, was simple. There were countless stories to choose from, which made it a challenge to decide what to exclude.

Then there was disappointment. It saddens me today.

Moments Not Capture

As part of the Remembering Janet service we were planning, I started looking for pictures and videos that we could share with our family and friends. I spent days looking through boxes and contacting family members and friends. Through all the searching, I found about 120 pictures that summarize my mom's life. About 20% of them are from my mom's wedding (40 years divorced), 20% are from my childhood, then there was a twenty-five-year gap, with the remaining pictures during the last ten to fifteen years. Seventy years of her life captured in just 120 pictures featuring her.

Most pictures I found were from my mom’s perspective, as she was often the one taking them. Many of those old photographs were unusable because of poor quality, a common issue when film had to be developed without knowing the results until later. Let's just say there were a lot of fingers in the way.

The main issue was that my mom, like many of us, disliked being photographed.

Picture This

Regardless of your age, I want you to think through this. You have a loving relationship with your mother, your father, or various members of your family—siblings, children, nieces, nephews, etc. You cannot imagine life without them.

There are many memories from the birth of a baby, birthday parties, the first day of school, family picnics, vacations, graduations, reunions, weddings, anniversaries, first home purchase, learning to ride the bike, getting a driver's license, and many more.

Every life is full of many firsts and many, many experiences.

What happens when your loved one passes and you can never call them again, reach for a hug, or to tell them how much you love and miss them? Worse, there are no pictures, no videos, and no voicemails?

All you have are your memories, and they are fleeting.

Call To Action

During the delivery of my message for my mother's Remembrance get together, I made this a key theme for my family and friends. From that day forward, I want everyone to take as many pictures, capture as many videos, and save as many audio recordings of their loved ones.

Annoy the heck out of your mom, your dad, your kids, and your close friends. Life is too precious and too short to not capture it.

Since we are in the digital age, there is no excuse to not capture these memories and experiences. Talk with your loved ones and store these in the cloud so everyone has access to them. Print them into photo books as keepsakes. One day, someone won’t be around, and you’ll regret not doing this.

The Extra Step

I encourage you to make personalized videos for your loved ones.

People often start recording themselves after being diagnosed with a life-threatening illness, so their family can remember them.

Why wait for a major event? Start today. Recording yourself may feel uncomfortable at first, but you’ll get used to it. Your family will cherish these recordings in your untimely passing.

I would even go as far as suggesting that you put an appointment on your calendar to make a quick video to save. Do this one to four times a year. This doesn't have to be a big chore or a professional production. Just make a two-to-five minute recording—say what is on your mind at that moment or reflect on a recent experience you don't want them to forget. Save it somewhere that can be accessible in the future (if/when needed). Take the extra step and put a link in your Legal Will.

Your family is better because of you. Ensure you capture these moments so they can always feel your presence with them.

In Loving Memory of My Mother

Thank You

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