Are we growing a society of no direction or hope?

Growing up there were never conversations about what I was going to do with my life. There were no conversations about goals, or aspirations, or purpose. Though I also knew that was my situation, specifically to me. For most of my childhood, my family was just trying to get through the day. Due to addiction and abuse going on. When I was in high school, no one ever talked to me about what my goals were. My only goal was getting through high school. So when I graduated from high school, I just got the first job that I could and started working. I went through my life just getting by. No talks about goals or hopes or trying to do better. Though when I was in my late 20s, I do remember there being talk about purpose and goals. About finding your purpose in life. A lot of that came from Oprah when she was on the air. There was a period of time when there was talk about it, about finding your purpose and your goals. Somewhere along the line, I feel like it went away. I just don't feel like there is so much talk about it now. Not a lot of talk about what your purpose is in life.

I feel like most people fall into two categories. One being people that want to get paid to do very little. Or people that post a video and make a lot of money from it, though they don't put all the work behind it. Another category, are people that are struggling so they are just trying to get through to the next day. I feel like that is a lot of people now. Most people are just trying to get by, trying to get through the month or even the week or day. When you are struggling to get by, thinking of your goals and purpose isn't something you have time for or the luxury for, either. There isn't conversations anymore about purpose or joy. Where did the conversations go about what your purpose on this earth is to be?

I'm halfway through my current term at college. So I am looking towards the future and considering what I am going to do next. It is forcing me to consider my future, and my real purpose of this world. I want to have a job that gives me real passion and joy. I want to make a difference, while being able to provide for my daughter on my own. My problem is that I have a picture of what I want my life to be like. Though I'm not sure how I want to get there. The journey feels like an uphill battle that is so far. Doing it on my own is overwhelming for me. If I don't try, I'll never succeed. I need to find my own belief that I have a purpose for this world.

To start, I think of what I am good at. I am good at organizing, scheduling, baking, typing, writing and building relationships. Though, what can I do with these skills? The real question should be what do I want to do with these skills? What is going to bring me joy, and purpose with my life. What will allow me to also be able to be there for my daughter? Being in school, I have been able to be there for her. To be there if she is sick, to pick her up every day, to do things with her. I don't want to lose that. So I feel like finding a way to work for myself, or at least work from home is the best option for the life that I want.

So what can I do with these skills? Honestly, thinking about it is overwhelming for me. Being a personal assistant is an option. So is being a professional organizer, or helping to manage a home, is also an option. That is intriguing for me. Though, I am worried on how to find clients. How do you even go about doing that? Due to my love for baking, I would love to be able to have my own baking business. Though I love it, making something that is good enough to sell worries me for some reason. I feel like anything that I make is never good enough to be able to sell. I need to practice. If I really try, then I feel like I can get good enough to be able to sell. That is scary, but also something that I feel like I can have real joy out of.

I also really want to be a counselor. With so many people having addiction problems, more and more people need help. Giving my family history, I feel like I might be able to make a real difference out there. It might be a long road to get there, but I believe that I could do it.

Thinking of the future may seem overwhelming for me. But I need to find my purpose in this world so that I can have some real joy. Who says that I can't try all of these things? Doing a little bit of each of them, until I really find my purpose. No matter what your age, or what your life looks like, it is never too late. I can do it, I can figure it out.

-T