8 Secrets to Becoming Untouchable

Untouchable (n).When you're truly at peace and inline with yourself, nothing anyone says or does bothers you and no negativity can touch you.

Every single one of us would be lying if we said our main goal in life wasn't to be completely and utterly 100 percent happy. Think about it, the only reason we want something in life is because of the way we think it will make us feel. HAPPY. The question is, how do we achieve it? Even if happiness is attainable, it doesn’t mean it’s sustainable—mainly because we give other people so much power over our emotions or giving the bad stuff too much of our energy. This is where becoming untouchable comes into play.

1. The thing that fucks us up most in life is the picture in our head of how it's supposed to be.

This used to be a big deal for me. Nothing in my life was the way I thought it would be and I became pissed off at the world. One day I came across Tony Robbins on YouTube and he literally blew my mind. He taught me that we all have a blueprint, an expectation, an ideal image of how our lives are supposed to be and the only time we become unhappy is when our lives don't match that print. Whether it’s your income, relationship status, career, living arrangements, or anything else that doesn’t match, we’ve all got at least one area of our life that we’re not happy with and that’s okay but please do yourself a favour—lower your expectations and change your blueprint.

2. Comparison is the thief of all joy.

If you continuously compete with others, you become bitter, but if you compete with yourself, you become better. No one can make you feel inferior without your consent. Someone else's success is not your failure and just because it’s taking you longer doesn't mean you'll never achieve it. Everybody’s journey is different. Receiving your first degree at 29 is still an achievement. Buying your first home at 35 is still exciting AF. Getting married at 43 is still beautiful. Passing your driving test at 21 is still amazing! Live your life with purpose and comparison can't touch you. Your story is unique and so different, it’s not worthy of comparison.

3. Worry about loving yourself rather than the idea of other people loving you.

I’m a strong believer of putting yourself at the top of your to-do list and watching everything else fall into place. Loving yourself starts with liking yourself, respecting yourself, and thinking of yourself in positive ways. The more you love yourself, the less nonsense you'll tolerate from anybody else. Let others see exactly how it should be done. The minute you realise your worth, you shift your energy to attract new people into your life who respect your worth. It starts with you first. Own who you are and let yourself shine.

4. Stop chasing people.

In fact, literally ignore those who threaten your joy. Say nothing and do not invite them into your space. Let those who gravitate towards you enjoy your presence. We spend way too much time begging people to stay, clinging, and proving our worth. Start noticing and cherishing the people who WANT you around by choice. Those are the people that matter. If someone chooses to walk away, let them.

5. Replace the negative with positive.

Replace negative thoughts with positive thoughts. Replace negative comments with positive comments. Replace negative words with positive words. Anything you can think of, replace it and you'll start seeing positive results but first you have to notice it. Instead of ranting about that rude customer, try complimenting a stranger. Instead of thinking how fed up you are that something isn’t going your way, try thinking of all the things you are grateful for in that single moment. Instead of looking in the mirror and noticing your flaws, pinpoint all the things you love about yourself. Train your mind to see the good in every situation. A positive mind towards everything will give you a happier life. Your attitude determines your direction.

6. Don't get upset with people or situations. Both are powerless without your reaction.

Most of our stress comes from the way we react, not the way life actually is. Adjust your attitude and all that stress is gone. If someone mistreats you, it’s a reflection on them. There is a huge amount of freedom that comes to you when you take nothing personally. You have to love yourself enough to set standards you're unwilling to compromise. If you accept low standards, you'll never be happy. Contrary to popular belief, nobody owes you a damn thing. Not a text back, not a smile, not even fair treatment or loyalty. Everyone is entitled to go about life in whatever manner makes them happy, including you. Do not let other people's behaviour destroy your peace. Rise above it.

7. Surround yourself with people who encourage your growth and make you happy.

And eliminate what doesn't help you evolve. We are the average of the five people we spend the most time with. Whether you believe this to be true or not is your call but we do know how greatly influenced we are when it comes to relationships and friendships. It affects our way of thinking, our self-esteem, and our decisions. Choose people that reflect who you want to be and how you want to feel and be brave enough to walk away from those that are weighing you down. Energies are contagious.

8. Stop apologising.

You don't have to say sorry for the way you laugh, your dress sense, how you style your hair, the way you speak, your weight or how you spend your time. You don't have to be sorry for being yourself. Do it fearlessly. It’s time to accept this is you and you gotta spend the rest of your life with you. So start loving your sarcasm, your awkwardness, your weirdness, your peculiar habits, your unique sense of humour, your voice, your talents, your everything. It will make your life so much easier to simply be yourself.