SURPRISE

I miss my flight to leave back to Arizona. My first time ever to miss a flight. So now my entire day will be lagging, I call the Q.C. Manager, she says I'll see you when you get here. Everyone is happy I'm back to work, I'm the head of Quality Control Managers' right-hand man/woman in this case; as well as being the Document Control Specialist, just some big title that's all that is. I do not like being "on-call" after I leave work to go home. I've hired on with Moll Medical, div. of Moll Industries Inc. they've since closed the doors in Tucson and possibly even in Texas, but I was lucky enough to be hired on to move the Costa Mesa location that was manufacturing devices for 22 years to the Tucson location, the only team players were the Plant Manager that actually made the move with the company. Nobody else from California moved with it, so, all the new hires that were sent to Costa Mesa were housed at an extended stay for 6 months, it was a nice little vaca away from Tucson. The Little Vietnamese woman that trained me didn't want me to leave Carol, she even offered me her home to stay with her & her husband if I wanted to, she was such a sweetheart. She was adopted to a Christian family as a refugee and raised in Seattle, WA. She said at the first meeting to me, I reminded her of her stepsister. That sounded so weird. But, look at all the celebrities adopting kids from other countries. It's not that weird really.

I did have my daughter and grand-kids fly out for Easter, we all went to Disney my brother 3 years younger than me treated us. And then we had Easter dinner at his house and the younger brother along with his wife and 2 kids came over for the feast. Why do we always make so much food? Way over the serving size helping that's for sure. At Disneyland my grandson cried nearly the entire day, strangers would stop and say, you don't cry at the Happiest place on earth? He didn't care, he kept crying, unless he was sleeping he was crying, don't know why? My daughter said she felt so bad on the plane because he cried for an hour straight, his sister had her own seat and he had a lap and wanted a seat too. Yes, he was a crier.

For some strange reason, every time I walk past a certain area my ears start to burn then down my shoulders, neck, jaw, throat, and back. OK? What's going on, I tell my coworkers Donna & Al about these strange feelings I'm having since returning from Wisconsin, Donna said maybe its an allergy, and there is a crap-load of Mesquite trees outside the building, so I brush it off as that's what's going on. I just deal with it all week long, and the only thing that seems to help is lounging in the pool. I tell Donna Friday after work that I will go to a walk-in clinic over the weekend if allergy meds don't help. Stupid me. So, Its Sunday, and while in the shower I can't handle the pain any longer. I stand there and let the water hit my face while I sob.

When I get out, I sit at my computer and pull up my medical id cards' 800 numbers, they use to advertise Ask A Nurse (?) in Florida So, that's what I'm gonna do. I call my last insurance carrier because I hadn't received the card from Moll Medical private insurer yet, they said they were mailed out, but still waiting; so I call Cigna, and explain what's been going on and am told to get to the hospital it sounds like I'm having a heart attack. Jeez! You don't have to scare me already. I tell my daughter what I've been told, and can you drive me to the hospital? I need to get to the bottom of this.

Its 4th of July week next week & this is the first time this year where I will not have to work any overtime at all, I love going to work every day and seeing my co-workers but 16 hour days are getting to be too much this will be a much-needed break. My daughter drives me to Tucson Medical Center, it's far less congested with People and maybe the closest to our house as well. The University Medical Center has always had such a long wait 13-17 hours(?) not for me, I was told they send you home with a "beeper" like device that alerts you when they are ready to see you, the sound of that was such a turn off so I said you're the driver you take me wherever you feel is best.

So, TMC it was, I quickly found out when you mention chest pains you not only don't wait but in fact, they get you in to see a nurse ASAP and take your vitals and then a Doctor follows; the Doctor on call orders the blood test that looks at an enzyme that shows up when you've had a heart attack. Did I mention I'm only 47 and very active; walking 3 to 5 miles a day? I've introduced both my grand-kids to some activities, bike riding, baseball anything to get them out there and out of the house. My Grand-daughter is a little pistol and is referred to by mom to be her social butterfly, we get to the park and she runs to the closest crowd of kids, "Hi guys!" So darn cute. My grandson is 3 years younger than his sister and more reserved he doesn't stray far from mom if he can at all help it.

The Doctor comes back and says the enzyme test is negative so no heart attack, then she asks me to explain what's going on, Where do I begin? The airport & chest tugging sensation & the feelings while at work all week long. OK, it sounds like Angina, can you take a little walk for me? Just walk over to that door over there as she points, which was maybe 6 feet away and I get an attack, Angina Attack not a heart attack, OK, I think we're going to keep you overnight for observation and she orders a nitro drip the lowest dose at first becomes the highest dose by nighttime. I'm going to miss my grandsons and granddaughters birthdays, 6-25 &7-01 consecutively, my daughter does dual parties to save, time energy, and money I'd guess which she waited until this weekend because I would be back home from Wisconsin. Home from Wisconsin but sadly not home. I always had a feeling deep down inside that someday my lifestyle would get the best of me. I'm a good person don't get me wrong. But since 1997 I've worked too many hours a day for too many days in a row, and I partied just as hard, which almost always resulted in worshiping the porcelain "Goddess". I do love a good bourbon or Whiskey. I never learned when to stop until later on in life, and I smoked cigarettes too. I did quit in the fall of 1999. But Doctors made it sound like that didn't matter, the damage was done from the first puff.

The on-call doctor called the Tucson Heart hospital to get a doctor in to see me. He told me if I smoke to stop, I thought you obviously don't read very well. And in that same breath, he told me I need to lose weight, no shit, Doc. I've been dealing with that all my life thank you very much. I don't think I'm going to like you I'm thinking, I can tell already you have the bedside manner of a cow, if it wasn't for his nurse practitioner I probably would've asked for a different opinion. And this coming from a Doctor who was a little Rollie Pollie himself. I think if doctors going to tell a patient about their weight they better be a beanpole and practice what they preach. A Doctor year's back had told me to lose weight when I was nowhere near this size and he was very much overweight himself. I know I'm not skinny, our family doesn't have “skinny” in our DNA. Thank God my kids are blessed with the skinny genes from their father's side. I made that comment once to my grandson who was 14 at the time, he out-weighs his mom by 40 pounds and his mom's brother by 20 pounds. He says, Nana? Mom's brother is not skinny he has a big beer belly; so? I said that maybe but the rest of him is skinny. Besides that, when he was your age and his first year in high-school he had a 28-inch waist, and it's been how long ago was your 28inchs?

An ex-brother-in-law made a comment once that I was a beached whale while in a one-piece hanging out with a favorite sister-in-law in the backyard sunning ourselves'. Turns out he's gay according to his brother and other family members, saying he was crying like a little bitch at a family reunion. It just goes to prove nobody's perfect! Uncle Bob! Besides that, you can fix being fat with little to no money, but to fix your face “Uncle Bob”, that can get pretty costly and expensive. Yeah, I said it... you were hit with the ugly stick and I wasn't. God, I feel so much better saying that. There was another Bob from high-school that use to call me fat Albert, every single time he saw me, he'd start singing the song for Fat Albert, and again another human being born and hit with the ugly stick. If you going to be on the “bullying” side you better not live in a glasshouse.

So the cardiologist advises that he's going to order some tests which are normally run for Heart disease or heart-related issues; like Lipid Panels which I lowered mine with diet change from a total of 213 in 1999 to a 203 in 2004 not bad for just changing my diet with no medication. By the way? Isn't it up to your PCP-primary care physician to give you a prescription to control the HDL & LDL? An exercise stress test,{treadmill style} the Angina prevented me from doing, as well as attempting to do an echo-cardiogram the Angina prevented me from doing, the nurses assigned to me, were strolling me around on a hospital bed or gurney in the freezing ass hallways in the hospital like chickens with their heads cut off they finally decide to call the cardiologist to inform him the Angina attacks are preventing my body to cooperate and keep still during these testings. He said the only thing left is a Cardiac catheterization that involves passing a thin flexible tube (catheter) into the right or left side of the heart. The catheter is most often inserted from the groin or the arm. And he schedules that test for me the next morning. I'm literally scared, figuring this doctor is going to see my heart ready to jump out of my chest, just like in the cartoons, sometimes in one's life the best thing to do is just "grin & bear it". Having a sense of humor is always a good thing, after all, God has a sense of humor the bible says like in Ecclesiastes 3:2-4 A time to be born and a time to die. A time to plant and a time to harvest. A time to kill and a time to heal. A time to tear down and a time to build up. A time to cry and a time to laugh. A time to grieve and a time to dance.

After the test is complete the doctor walks out without saying anything, I'm like, OK? He comes into my room after I get wheeled back in there. My prognosis is somewhat a bit different than what I had expected to say the cardiologist states, I thought maybe you just needed a stent placed based on your family history and age, but unfortunately, after the Cardiac catheterization, I'm going to have to consult with a heart surgeon. Oh my God? What? But I'm only 47? What a way to celebrate the 4th of July, does this mean I get a new birthday or 2 birthdays? Did I wonder? I hate that word, Unfortunately.

So that next afternoon I meet the heart surgeon and my daughter is in the room by my bedside always my rock that I love to the moon and back. After he introduces himself to us he explains that I need to have a 1-way bypass or a CABG, that they'll harvest veins from my leg to put into the heart, he asks me if I'd like to watch a video of what the operation will look like? I reply, do you really want to scare me so I don't get this done? Then he says they'll take me in for surgery the morning of July 5th, and ends with? Do you have any questions for me? First of all, this is a very seasoned Indian doctor that's apparent by all his gray hair taking nearly complete control of his brown hair. So I first ask how many patients have died with him during the operation and how many surgeries has he performed? He says I can't give an exact number of surgeries but I've been doing this for 44 years and only 2 have died that had other health issues going into the operation. That gave me a little solace and 1 last question? What if I don't have the surgery and just take angina medication or other medicine, how long will I live? It's hard to say, 1 to 2 years at the most; daughter chimes in, that's not an option, you'll be fine mom. To explain the procedure is as follows:

Coronary Artery Bypass Surgery (CABG)

During coronary bypass surgery, your breastbone is divided in half to expose your heart. Your heart is then connected to a heart-lung machine which completely takes over the function of your heart and lungs, permitting the surgeon to temporarily stop your heart. In which my heart was outside of my body, as I was told after the fact that when the team turned my heart over there were 2 vessels they felt that also needed repairing, as long as they were in there, they might as well. So instead of a 1-way CABG, I now have a 3-way CABG. With the heart still, the surgeon then bypasses the blocked coronary arteries with vein taken from your leg or arteries taken from your chest or arm. My left leg right around the inside of my knee area and above that about 4 inches up have a nice scar that thankfully is hidden with Capri's, pants, and dresses. Your heart is then allowed to resume beating, it is disconnected from the heart-lung machine, and your breastbone is closed with wires. Gotta love that scar, I still try to hide it, I was told once by a clinics intake specialist, I don't hide mine, she boosts I show it off, that way people can see what I've gone through. I guess some peoples' ideas for attracting attention are not of those shared with me. The operation usually takes from three to five hours. And mine was an exception it took 7 hours my daughter said. I imagine she was bored outta her gourd, During and immediately after the surgery, you will have a small tube in your bladder to drain urine. You always feel like you have to pee, I even told a nurse, later on, I had to pee, not thinking I had the catheter in she says go ahead, you're OK? I must've had a very strange look on my face, she says, “you have the catheter it's fine”. Here I thought I was going to pee all over the place. The surgeon then will divide the breastbone and spread the ribs to get to the heart. The heart-lung machine will take over the work of your heart and lungs. The surgeon will remove a small length of a blood vessel from your leg or chest. Then he will begin sewing it to your heart vessels. Once the work is done, the surgeon will start your heart and turn off the heart-lung machine. Your breastbone will be wired shut and your wound will be closed with stitches or staples. All staples. Horrible, what happened to use superglue? You may have two or more small pacing wires on your chest. If needed, these wires will be used to help control your heartbeat. A pacemaker. I use to make these at Pacesetters in Scottsdale Arizona, the company later sold to and renamed St Jude Cardiac rhythm Management Division. Three sales and three names in 3 years, we would always joke around that we'd get to work one day and our badges wouldn't open the door. Initially, I didn't even know what that wire thing was, although I did say to my daughter, doesn't it look like they forgot to remove this? It had like a tiny hook on the end, or the wire was just formed to look like a hook, probably to make it easier to grab and pull. The surgeon visits me telling me I'm well enough to go home and continue walking a little more every day, And I'll be going home with Physical Therapy information to follow up with them, here's a heart pillow that I need to take with me to rest on my chest every time I get in the car, don't sit in the seat where an airbag is. Oh, and let me take this from you, you won't need it anymore, as this seasoned doctor says in a humorous tone as he pulls the pacesetter lead wire outta my chest So that's what the wire thing was I say? And I thought all Indians Doctors were all serious and nothing but serious. They will be removed before you go home. You will have two or three tubes in your chest and will be hooked to a machine to drain extra air and blood. The tubes will be taken out in about a day. That was a little freaky, two nurses come in and tell me they need to remove the PICC line. Which is a thin, soft, long catheter (tube), they weren't kidding long. That's inserted in the arm, leg, or neck [the latter] in my case. The tip of the catheter is positioned in a large vein that carries blood into the heart. The PICC line is used for long-term intravenous (IV) antibiotics, nutrition or medications, and blood draws. My arms were both black and blue, the forearms and both hands, and I have good veins. TMC has a nursing school, and they'd have there students draw your blood every hour if they couldn't get a vein after 3 tries then they were told to call the head nurse to come in. Can you say pincushion? When the two nurses come in and tell me there are going to be removing the PICC line my daughter is in the room and they say, when they start to take it out we are all going to just “hum”, until it's out, the expression on my daughters face, shes humming louder and louder as it slowly is inched out. It was a couple of feet long I'd guess probably I remembered saying, where was that hiding? When it was out.

You will be taken to the Cardiac Surgery Intensive Care Unit. You will have a breathing tube in your windpipe. This was by far the worst experience I'd ever had to deal with in my life to date. My gag reflex is incredibly unbearable, my daughter even tells the IC nurse, he says the tube stay's in until I'm breathing on my own, that experience was just as hard on me as it was on my daughter, her empathy level is very high, and she didn't like seeing me struggle with that any longer and had to leave to throw-up she told me later. And I only get chips of ice once an hour, what a tease! It was the longest possible time ever, I was so thirsty too. The longest 4 hour period I'd ever had to succumb to. Thank God that plastic thing is outta my throat and mouth and I get to control when I want the ice chips now, Yeah? A challenge defeated. Then, I'm told as soon as you go to the bathroom on your own you will be moved to a room, oh good? Just ring the buzzer so a nurse can assist you outta bed. I can't wait to get out of this dark-ass hole in the wall? The nurse may use a small tube to remove mucus from the lungs and mouth to prevent a build-up in the lungs. I don't remember any of that, but I'm sure my daughter may be able to recollect everything that happened to me that I don't, she was there too. The procedure can cause pain, make you cough and make it hard to breathe, but you may be given drugs to treat these symptoms. As you wake up, you will be weaned from the machine that is helping you to breathe. Once this happens and you are breathing on your own, the tube in your windpipe will be taken out. After the breathing tube is removed, you will have a mask on your face to give you oxygen. The facemask will be taken off and you will have a small tube under your nose to provide oxygen. If you are in pain, please tell your nurse, who can give you drugs to ease the pain. You must take deep breaths and cough 10 to 20 times an hour to prevent fluid build-up in your lungs. You will learn to use a small gauge, called an incentive spirometer, to see how deep your breaths are and to train yourself to breathe deeply. After about a day or two, you will move to the Cardiac Progressive Care Unit, where you will be for three to five days. Then you will go home. Most of your stitches are inside and will dissolve over time. The staples will be taken out five to seven days after surgery. If the staples are still in when you go home, arrangements will be made to have a home health nurse come to your home to remove the staples. Wrong, I had to make an appointment with the surgeon's office where they removed them, which clearly needed to be removed prior to my appointment as the skin started growing over the staple ends in a few of them. You will slowly start walking more, begin exercises to help you heal, and learn what to do when you get home. Finally, I've passed ICU's little huddles and am off to a shared room with a nice elderly woman who was found face down in her house by her daughter who thought she was dead, but only suffered a heart attack and she lived to tell the story, she's a little upset to see me moving at a quicker level than she has and is told I get to go home after an 11 day stay, while she'd already been there for 2 weeks. I felt sorry for her, but again I was only 47 she was 70 and on one daily walk with a therapist, I asked, how old was the youngest person to date to have heart surgery, and how many vessels? I'm learning the lingo, I'm very surprised to hear his response the person was a marathon runner a woman 26 who had an a6-way bypass. Wow, I said, I don't feel bad at all now. It is going to be a long road ahead of me, I buy a treadmill so I can exercise in the confines of my house and not worry about going outside in the very hot Arizona sun and walk, I didn't need to fall out on the scalding blacktop or cement. Although I still do go out once in a while, when the weather is cooler and my daughter feels relief to have her daughter ride her bike along next to me on our walks. She loved being active when she was little.