When losing weight, fasting was my go to practice and thanks to this i made it 110 lbs. But what I didn't know was the negative effects that this practice has in a women body. Even though this practice is different for many people and my experience might be different from others, at the end of the day it is about how we feel most comfortable. Many might have a different experience from mine and remember that everyone's body is different and my experience might be different from others.
Not Being Happy Even When Skinnier- All my life i had extra pounds and it was hard when i was compared to my siblings. When the results from fasting were showing people around me seemed to be happy that I was losing weight, but inside it didn’t make me happy. Even though people weren’t comparing me to my siblings, I didn't feel myself and that made me change my perspective about weight loss. Sometimes trying to make others happy doesn’t make you happy and seeking happiness is the point of life.
Not Adequate When Pregnant- Fasting when pregnant it could be more dangerous that anything that i women might do while pregnant. Finding out that you are pregnant while fasting was happy for me but the happiness didn’t last too long. Losing a pregnancy made me change my mind about fasting because it took a toll on my body and going back to eating it was something that my body was rejecting.
My own Body- After the hard experience that i had when losing weight; i saw clarity with myself and accepting myself for what i’m was one of the most rewarding phases that a person must go through. Accepting myself, ignoring harass comments and eating healthy is one of the things that has made me love myself. Self destruct is what at this point of my life i realize that being compared to my siblings had tryger and many times it was hard to see it. It took me this painful journey to realize that no one would ever love me or respect me if I kept going with the self hate.
Is hard when a person is not accepted by their families but sometimes having a terrible experience is the answer to finding out who really is your friend and finding yourself. Weight loss is more than being skinnier and that is something that many don’t realize. Weight loss is about finding out how and what makes your persona comfortable and happy. Even though many have different views on weight loss, the society that we live in is still not fully accepting of extra pounds and rejecting different people, we all should remember that our differences are what makes us perfect in our own ways.
Loving yourself and accepting who you are no matter what anyone thinks is one of the many rewards of going through an experience of losing weight. Only a person who truly hates itself would go through the experience of trying to be what others want it to be. There might be many reasons for why a person might want to lose weight but there is something that everyone must have in mind which is what works for others might not work for you and while going through this journey have in mind for who you are doing it for, don’t let self hate take control of your life nor your persona.
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Veronica E
College Student and writer.
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Pain.
Winter just came, the leaves start falling, the trees start changing colors and so do our feelings. Feeling lonely when she was around people that loved her. One year and three months ago she took the worst decision of her life. One year and three months ago her name was called, she followed the nurse, to a white room with two other girls there. One of the girls was crying , she did not know if it was pain or regret. The second girls seem nervous but calm at the same time. After observing the two girls in the room she was infected with something in her arm. Five minutes later she felt chills down her spine, pain in her abdomen and that's when she knew that was the beginning of her painful journey.There were only three girls in the room and the more they waited more was the pain.One by one were been called and then she was left in the room to wait for the worst. She was called, she knew what was about to come was going to mark her for the rest of her life but she still went thru. She was brought to one room where she was asked to remove her closed, they followed her by asking if she was in pain to which she replied with a nod. She was brought to one small white room. The only thing that she could do when she saw the utensils was to cry. The nurse asks her to lie down which she did. She was told to count to 20 till she fell asleep. She counted one she heard one of the doctors say “what are you doing that every girl that you bring me has been crying”. Two she asked Jesus for forgiveness before she broke down crying one again. Three she heard the song “rolling in the deep”, the anestesia did its work. Nurses were talking and girls were crying out of pain all around the floor. Next thing she knew she was awakened by the worst pain that she was ever felt. One nurse came up to her applying one hot bag in her stomach, making the pain worse. The nurse told her that it was ok and not to cry but she kept crying. The nurse applied the bag once again and the pain came with blood but she was told that it was normal and that it was going to keep bleeding for a couple of days. Still in painShe was asked to change and to take some pills for the pain. When she went out of the clinic, the only thing that she did was cry not out of pain but out of regret. On their way home he asked her if she was ok, she did not say a word but cry, and he knew it wasn't from the pain. When they got home she could not get out of the car because of the pain and when she did she discover that she was bleeding once again. He helped her get out of the car and when she went inside their home she changed and sat on the bed and cried. Days went by and they were growing apart they could not hold the pain. A woman and her newborn child move to the apartment just above them. The first night that the child cried she was awake hearing the baby cry and broke her heart and she couldn't keep it anymore and she cried herself to sleep that night. He was on the other side of the bed hearing her cry broke his heart but he knew that she was strong. Without knowing they both cry themselves to sleep that night. He tries getting close with her because he knew what was kicking her inside. He had promised himself to not make her cry again. One day he came back from work and saw her just sitting in the bed with red eyes. That is when he broke down in front of her and told her and told her that if he could go back and change things he would. Some people think that having a abortion is a easy choice but for her it wasn’t, when pregnant she had fainted more than one. The second time that she fainted she was brought to the hospital where her dreams were crushed. She was told that they could not find the baby's heartbeat, she refused to believe it; she asked for other doctors' opinions but it was the same. She had to make a decision; They argued for hours on what to do next, he did not want her and she did not want to lose the baby but she knew that she had to make a decision and she did. She knew that she was young and that in the future with a much better health and stress free she could bear a child. He promised her to give a child after three years and she accepted. It was hard for them to trust in each other. But love is stronger than pain.
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