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Sounds Like Love

Disclaimer: this story contains coarse language and a scene that may be disturbing to (polite) readers. Reader discretion is advised!

By Donna Fox (HKB)Published 7 months ago Updated 7 months ago 3 min read
14
Sounds Like Love
Photo by Katja Rooke on Unsplash

Click. Click. Click.

I sat on the couch clicking away on the TV remote, flicking through the channels in search of something of substance.

Suddenly I felt a rumble in my gut that made its way through my system until I felt it poised for action. With little effort a cheek slapper squelched out, Brrruuuppahssshhhh Which echoed out, loud enough to wake the dead. Simultaneously it rattled along the couch cushions with enough vigour to shake the cushions below my partner.

Through the corner of my eye watch as she stops scrolling on her phone for a moment.

Her gaze rose from her phone and landed on me with displeasure.

I stopped clicking and chanced a smile at her, but was met by a death glare.

Her mouth hung open in disbelief as she narrowed her eyes and furrowed her brow, in an expression that said ‘Are you for real?’.

Knowing better than to push my luck, I bit back an amused giggle and returned to my channel surfing.

My partner soon did the same, scrolling through her phone just as she had been before.

Finally, I had found a show that would occupy my mind, but in that came relaxation. Which after our dinner of beans and other fuel for tooting, I knew I was in serious trouble.

The same rumble as earlier had returned, making its way through my system but I knew this was going to top the last one. 

Now I had a choice to make, after the welcome reception of my last trumpet call, I had to decide how to present this. I could do the polite thing and leave to relieve myself, but where was the fun in that?

Inhaling deeply for some good fuel I push just enough to give it momentum, but not hard enough to let anything else slip. Or at least I hoped nothing else would.

Brrruuuppahssshhhh, It came out in a low rumble and slowly built into an earth-shattering, couch-shaking explosion of sounds that pop and squeak into existence. In my mind, it carried on for several moments but was more like seconds. As soon as it ended, I suppressed a smile and laugh and looked over to my partner, in anticipation.

She sat there in utter shock, her mouth hung open, again.

Which gave me secondhand regret as the smell engulfed me and I had to fight from bursting into laughter. I coughed a little as I held a hand over my mouth to suppress the boyish sniggering that tried to escape my lips. I closed my eyes and pulled my shirt over my face to escape the foul scent of my own ass, still trying not to laugh.

My partner still held her look of disbelief, but it turned to disgust as she smacked her lips together. Then let out a yell of disapproval as she tossed her phone to the side and pulled her shirt over her face too. 

She began shaking violently, but with half her face covered and my eyes watering I couldn’t tell if she was laughing or crying until I heard it. She was snorting with laughter.

Which in turn made me burst into laughter, too.

The pair of us howled in unison. We giggled in bursts until our stomach ached and the smell dissipated.

Eventually, we escaped our shirt cocoons to breathe fresh air, or at least fresher air than before.

Wiping a few tears from my eyes, I looked at my partner. Admiring her rosy cheeks as a few more giggles escaped her lips, smiling at me as she regained control.

Then an unexpected few pops escaped her Puh Puh Puh Puh and drove us into another fit of laughter which only made more sound escape her, sounding like the rumble of marbles being dropped on a carpet floor. Puhpuhpuhpuhpuh.

We laughed so hard, I thought my sides would split. 

It was at that moment, as the smell overtook us and we vacated the living room in search of unaffected air. I knew she was the one for me.

LaughterFunnyCONTENT WARNING
14

About the Creator

Donna Fox (HKB)

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Comments (12)

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  • L.C. Schäfer6 months ago

    Ahhh, love is when you can fart in front of each other 😁❤❤

  • Novel Allen6 months ago

    I cannot eat beans and be around human beings. Your story of farting through the humor community is smellingly hilarious. This is such fun and not what I should be reading with my morning cocoa. You have been busy and naughty since I last visited. 🤔😏🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰

  • ThatWriterWoman6 months ago

    EY you did choose the word slapper! This was cute and kinda romantic in a strange way- nice!

  • Donna Renee6 months ago

    CACKLING over this 🤣🤣💩 💨. There have been some epic smells in my house this weekend as the stomach bugs works through the fam and this story goes along perfectly 🤣🤣🤣. I can’t pick a fav description but “my last trumpet call” made me picture them holding a trumpet up to their butt and playing it that way and that is just hilarious 🤣🤣

  • When I read your subtitle, I was like, "Ha! Polite readers! Pffft! So weak!" So yea, turns out I'm one of those polite readers 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 I mean I knew you were writing a story that had farting and that part came early on in this story. But what I wouldn't take was the smell 🤣🤣🤣🤣 Which goes to show what an excellent writer you are to able to disgust your reader this much! You're incredibly amazing! There were so many parts that I laughed out loud! It was just so hilarious! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

  • Thavien Yliaster7 months ago

    I can't tell if this is from a dude's perspective or a woman's, but whoever it's from, it's hilarious! "Eventually, we escaped our shirt cocoons to breathe fresh air, or at least fresher air than before." - I initially read that as "shit cocoons." Don't know why, but probably because of the imaginary smell. Lowkey, I know it's humor, but since it's not in the fiction community it wouldn't surprise me if You wrote about this from one of Your own waking moments, Donna! Ha! I'm glad the person decided to laugh, cause for one laughter's contagious. Plus, the glare from earlier just intensified the laughter, cause it's funnier to laugh at something that You shouldn't be laughing at. Oh gosh, I remember when I was in Church one time and somebody let one rip, and our entire bench shook from the vibration. It was so loud I almost didn't hear the Priest for a moment. I was sitting between both of my parents and thank goodness I turned to face the more responsible one at the moment, cause if I had faced the other, we would've been red in the face and barely able to breathe from trying to repress our laughter. Reading the "puh puh puh" makes me think that the girlfriend was letting out silent butt deadly farts the entire time she was scrolling. Just spreading her cheeks slightly enough to let the air squeeze out unnoticed, except for a change in temperature, moisture, and of course smell. Ah, I needed a story like this. Thanks again, Donna!

  • Alex H Mittelman 7 months ago

    I love it! The air might smell but your story is fantastic! Excellent work 💙💜❤️🧡♥️💚🩶🧡🤎🩵💓💕💙

  • Mark Gagnon7 months ago

    Well you might say this really stinks!🤪 Definitely not a breath of fresh air. Funny story, Donna!

  • J. S. Wade7 months ago

    Lmao. This is a stinkin great story 😎🫣🤣🥰

  • Jazzy 7 months ago

    This was so adorable omg Lol you know they are a keeper when

  • Alexander McEvoy7 months ago

    This was so sweet! i love love, and these two seem to have the most pure and wholesome kind. Able to laugh together over things like these, and POV still finds her beautiful as she struggles to breath over the giggles. You made me laugh outloud and put a huge smile on my face :) Deeply needed today of all days :)

  • Paul Stewart7 months ago

    this is breathtaking, oddly sweet and hilarious! well done, Donna!

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