P Is For Pool. No Running

"It's too hot for this!"

the fan exclaimed,

as sweat beaded on my brow.

Off in a dream, I reminisced

reality to disavow.

Ice cubes filled my water glass

as my creases filled with sweat.

"When was the last time it got this hot?"

my beach towel asked, "this heat makes me forget."

I rolled and wiped the run off

before I dipped into the pool.

The coolness of the water

and my cocktail made me drool.

The fan yelled, "put me on the tube,

I wanna feel the gentle sway."

"It's not fair, you selfish boob

I've been sending cool air your way all day!"

I rolled my eyes and hollered, "geez,

"what in the world are you thinking?"

"when your apms meet the chlorine

more than the lights here will be blinking."

The heat had me so irate, I yelled,

"just do your job and keep on blowing."

That's when it got hotter than hell

as the fan blades began slowing.

"No, no, no, no," I screamed, I wailed, I begged

and quickly ran, leaving the pool

Head to toe, was dripping wet

forgetting about the golden rule,

I performed a stellar pirouette

unconscious in a pool of my own drool

Face first on the concrete

body parts exposed and bruised.

Seems the fan got the last laugh

as I knocked it in the water

The EMT said on my behalf,

"it appears the fan failed at manslaughter."

These days I run the A.C.

and the fan sits by the pool

Because if it comes to him or me

I pull my shades and keep my cool.