When You Want a Break in the Relationship, What Does This Mean?

When you want a break in the relationship, when one of you proposes a shorter or longer period of separation, before accepting it, you need to clarify some things between you. And the most important thing is: what exactly is this break in the relationship - a temporary period in which you think and clarify your desires and needs, or a step towards the final separation?

It is never easy to predict where a break in your relationship will lead: can it be a welcome respite to invigorate the relationship, or can it be the first step toward separation and separation? Most of the time, only one of the partners wants a break: the decision can be agreed upon, but only one of them wants it…

Before making this decision, you will have to talk about certain things, because the need for a break often camouflages the need for parting - but fear of the consequences of parting leads to proposing a break.

When you are the one who wants a break in the relationship:

Before proposing this break to your partner, think clearly and honestly about what you want, your motive: just a period in which to have time to clarify some aspects?

Or do you want to be alone, to be free, to see how it is without a partner with you? Have you thought about breaking up, but are you afraid of the consequences, so the break seems like a good solution at the moment? If in fact, you feel that the relationship is going nowhere and that you need something else, proposing a break only makes things even more confusing.

You tell your partner you just want a break - but you want the end… Although a breakup can never be easy, instead of keeping the other one waiting, you better end it now, if you feel the relationship doesn't make sense… The break is often just a way to delay the inevitable…

Do you want to be with your partner again, but at the same time want to take a break to find out how much you need a relationship with him? In other words, this break is a kind of test of the relationship: to see if you need a partner if you miss it if you want to resume the relationship? In this case, the break can clarify your feelings and needs.

But beware: if you want to try to date other people, see how it is with someone else, this already shows you that your needs are focused outside the relationship… A break is not a time to have fun and experiment - it is a time when you are alone and you clarify some confusing aspects, so if you feel the need for another person with you, the break can do nothing good for the relationship.

Do you want to continue the relationship, but do you feel the need to say "stop" for a moment, to think about the relationship? Do you feel that the relationship has evolved a bit fast for you and you are somewhat confused and scared of the future? Do you want the relationship, but do you want things to go back a little bit, to evolve more slowly? Do you feel that you have no control over your life and want to think about the future (including the couple)?

Are you going through a crisis or change and need a break? Then, a break can be beneficial - as long as you explain to your partner that you want your relationship, but that you need a little time. The time when you have to think about why you feel confused and scared, why you think the relationship is going too fast, why you feel suffocated.

A short separation can make things clear, it can show you how much you need a partner - but short! The longer a break in the couple's relationship, the more it is a sign that a break is not needed, but a breakup…

When your partner is the one who wants a break in the relationship:

Do not rush to accept, for fear that otherwise, you will break up! Because you can get to the breakup right after the break! Talk to your partner and try to find out why he/she wants this break! What does he/she won't - have you seen any signs that he or she wants to end the relationship?

What does he/she feel - does he/she still have feelings for you or does he/she seem distant, distant lately? Is he still attracted to you or have his eyes been running lately? Does he want to think about your relationship for a while, because he feels that it has gone too fast and he doesn't know exactly what he wants from his life and future?

Does he want a moment of respite because he is in a more stressful time in his life? Is she going through a crisis and needs time for herself (maybe the problem is not the relationship, but her life, her routine, her general problems, and her partner wants to think about all this for a while)? Does he want to be alone during this time, or does he want the freedom to meet other people?

Does he want to have you by his side (after the break) or does he not want you close (he has been avoiding you lately, he has moved away)? Think about all this and discuss it with your partner, so that you can try to figure out what the need for a break means: the need for clarification and time; or the need for separation?

No matter how hard it is, if you have seen the signs and if you feel that your partner no longer wants you, but is afraid of breaking up, you will have to confront him/her: "Do you want to break up?"

Set the break in the relationship. Very important: what your partner wants, a relatively short period (about a month), in which to sit and think about his life and your relationship; or a long period, in which you will actually move away from each other and which will most likely last until there is nothing left?!

The longer it takes, the lower the chances of resuming the relationship - it will get used to without you… One more thing, when you think about accepting the break - set an important rule: stop talking at all, or you will still communicate by phone / Internet? Does he want to hear what you're doing, or does he just want to hear from you?

If he finds it difficult to talk to you at all and wants to communicate over the phone or the Internet, he shows that he still needs you.

Once you have accepted a break in a relationship, the worst thing you can do is press your partner and disobey your decision! No matter how much you miss him/her, don't try to see him/her - give him/her the time he/she asked for, otherwise, you will make him/her feel even more suffocated.

Don't ask him to see you, don't ask him to shorten the break: follow the rules, give him what he wanted and see what happens once the set period has passed.

If you feel that things will not have a happy ending, because you have seen signs of distance from your partner, do not be fooled hoping; try to use this break to think in detail about your relationship, what works and what doesn't, and especially to prepare yourself emotionally in case it ends badly…