Use Absence To Increase Respect And Honor

“Absence diminishes minor passions and inflames great ones, as the wind douses a candle and fans a fire.” — Francois de La Rochefoucauld

Principles of law 16

Law 16 highly emphasis the importance of absence and scarcity. We people, in general, do not value the things we can have very easily. We tend to value things which is hard to attain. This is why, if you seem to be someone who is very easily accessible, then you might not appear as valuable to others.

In order to be perceived as valuable to others, you have to create a sense of absence. For instance, if you are involved in a group, take a break every now and then from interacting with others. In this way, your absence will entice curiosity in others, and they will admire you more.

But first, you have to learn when is the right time to distance yourself from others. By distancing yourself at the right time, you will be able to show a glimpse of your permanent disappearance, and you will gain others’ respect unwittingly.

Application of Law 16

One example of the application of Law 16 is Joseph Duveen, an art dealer. He used to purchase his entire art collection and store them. By doing this, he made his paintings inaccessible to the public, and this eventually increased his painting’s value. By applying this tactic, he was able to increase the market price for his art.

Another example is Greta Garbo, who was a Swedish-American actress. She purposely chose to exit the stage before her audience became bored of her presence. She applied the strategy of creating a sense of absence to gain respect from her audience.

You can also apply this tactic in both your personal and professional life. For instance, in your professional life, do not be always too available all the time to offer your distinctive service. Likewise, in your personal life make yourself less accessible and reachable now and then. In this way, you will be able to increase your value and, people around you will respect you.

A man said to a Dervish: “Why do I not see you more often?” The Dervish replied, “Because the words ‘Why have you not been to see me?’ are sweeter to my ear than the words ‘Why have you come again?”— Mulla jami, ldries Shah’s Caravan of Dream (1968)

If you are already at the center of attention, try not to be in the spotlight and grab attention from others all the time. If you do, people will lose interest in you quickly. It is very crucial that you distance yourself from the attention at the correct moment which will make people to be curious about you and admire you more.

Another perfect example of the application of law 16 would be the king Dioces. He wanted to be declared king of Medea back in the 9th century. But, during that period, the country was not considering accepting a monarch leader due to the previous leader’s bad reputation. This is why Dioces made sure that he had established a good reputation by resolving conflicts in a reasonable way. Because of his satisfactory reputation, people started to admire and respect him. After establishing a respectable reputation, he abruptly declared that he wants to distance himself from public life. His statement caused a chaotic situation as people believed they were losing a good leader and the public demanded him as a crowned king.

Even after becoming the king, he maintained his strategy of creating a sense of absence and scarcity. He distanced himself from the outside world and communicated with people only based on his schedule. In this way, he commanded respect during his fifty years of reign.

Final takeaways

If you try to apply Law 16 too soon, you might face negative consequences. Law 16 is effectively applicable only when you have developed a presence and proven your worth. If you haven’t proven your worth and earn the respect from others, you will not be remembered and respected. Instead, you will be forgotten.

Thank you for reading ❤

Disclaimer: The original version of this story was published on another platform.

Link to original version: https://medium.com/checkmate11/use-absence-to-increase-respect-and-honor-8b02126e458d

References:

Brad, T. (2019, November 25). Use absence to increase respect & honor | 48 LAWS OF POWER law 16 book summary/cliff’s notes [Video]. YouTube. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gLwDpiIO0IA&feature=youtu.be

Greene, R. (2000). The 48 Laws of Power (1st ed.). Penguin Books.

McFarlane, E. (2021, October 8). The 48 laws of power by Robert Greene summary. Oberlo. https://www.oberlo.com/blog/48-laws-of-power-robert-greene-summary

Penn, A. (2020, January 10). Law 16: Use absence to increase respect and honor (48 laws of power). Shortform Books. https://www.shortform.com/blog/48-laws-of-power-law-16-use-absence-to-increase-respect-and-honor/