U + Me

There should never be any competition between us, so why is there this loss of loyalty and love for one another?

I must have been crazy to think that you loved me. I saw all of the signs, but I didn’t say anything. I can think of all the times I crossed the line for you because I couldn’t see myself with anybody else but you. Please tell me what you have thought because this is what you wanted. You should have been the one to hold me when I got lonely. See, every time I think of all the lies you told to me, you made it easier for me to leave. Should I have spoken up sooner, of course, but because the love I had for you was all that I knew. No one told me that loving you would be this hard. In fact, no one told me that you were a dog from the beginning. My family sure didn’t tell me and they are the ones that I would have expected to let me know about bad men in this world, but they didn’t. They just let me walk around with you, knowing that you were not a loyal and committed man. Sure, you wanted the lifestyle of a king, but you never acted like a king. Then you have the nerve to get mad at me for not giving you the things a king should have. First of all, you didn’t deserve it then, and you don’t deserve it now. Truly, it is all my fault for allowing you to carry me the way that you did. All of the verbal abuse and the sleeping around with other women did you really think that I would stay with you. I mean, come on, you had to know that this day would come. I see you for who you truly are now, and leaving you was the best thing I have ever done for me. So, if you are pissed well, this means that you can find some other female to play your dummy because I am not that little girl that was mentally and physically broken back in the days for you.

Always forward, no matter what:

Sometimes, we all need to have a day to sit back and reflect on our past. Now, I am not saying that once you start to look back at your history, get all depressed and everything. No, don’t do that. Just look at it as a faded picture in broken glass. Do you want to stay in that mental state for too long, or are you going to smile at where you currently are today? I have learned that you don’t have to be financially costly to be happy with who you are as a person. Now having more money does help in many ways, but it is not the soul of happiness.

My thoughts.

When someone is recovering from abuse, no matter what kind of damage it is, that person will get tired of trying to make you happy when they know that you are no good for me anymore. I was this person for years, and having others mentally, physically, and spiritually try to kill you, there will be some changes made on your end. To all of the women/men who feel that they have no way out of whatever they are facing right now, I need you to know this. When you decide to leave, do it even if it takes you years of planning. U + Me was a lifelong lesson learned.

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