The Struggle with Kindness, Empathy, and Putting Yourself in Another Person’s Shoes

The Struggle with Kindness, Empathy, and Putting Yourself in Another Person’s Shoes

By. Angelica Garcia

Was there a time where you felt misunderstood or treated unfairly? If you told someone your story, any person who experienced something similar would understand. However, a person doesn't have to share something similar to understand. All that another person needs to do is put themselves in your shoes. As young children, many people were taught to treat others how they'd like to be treated, and they were challenged to put themselves in other people's shoes. For some reason, as some people become older, this concept is forgotten, and people would hurt other people without thinking about how they'd feel if it were the other way around.

There could be a lot of different reasons why this happens. Sometimes, some people may not think about it or even "want" to think about being kind and compassionate to others. Some people would prefer to put other things above thinking about how they'd feel if they were in another person's shoes. I get it. Things like goals, obligations, and work can get in the way. People can be so busy in their lives that taking the time to think about others and how they can feel can seem like too much work. It can also be deemed unnecessary compared to the many things people have to deal with in their lives.

But let's think about how there could be more kindness, peace, and understanding if more people decided to try their best to put themselves in other people's shoes for a moment. If this could happen, there could be more empathy, and more people could feel understood and happier. I know reading all of this might be hard for some, but the truth is we are more similar than we think. As Kelly Clarkson says, "We have more commonalities than differences." As a matter of fact, the act of feeling something specific due to specific things that happen in our lives is what we all share as humans. Certain things can make all of us feel happy, sad, overwhelmed, stressed, etc. Also, we all want to be understood, and we all get hurt when other people hurt us.

A woman named Rachel Grady once said, "Always put yourself in others' shoes. If you feel that it hurts you, it probably hurts the other person too." I know it may not be easy, but try to think about it. Imagine having to experience and live the life of someone else. How would you feel? I know some people would say, why should I? There is no point. I am me, and they are them. Whether I do it or not won't make any difference. The thing is, the act of putting ourselves in others’ shoes is encouraged to empathize with another person.

Unfortunately, the practice of empathy is not as valued compared to other things in this world, like social status, work status, and material things. Sure, anyone would love to receive empathy, but giving it to another person is a different story. As Lady Gaga sings in one of her songs titled Til It Happens To You, some people may not fully understand another person's feelings or circumstances until they experience everything for themselves.

In the end, it all depends on how people want to live their lives. They could decide to be kind and empathetic, or they could choose to not even bother. Not a lot of cultures focus on empathy. The measure of success and social status is more regarded than how people treat and empathize with one another. However, the truth is empathy is more valuable than what people think. Truth is a lot of people appreciate it when other people have kindness and understanding for them. So how about providing the same compassion to others? It can be challenging, but if more people practice giving and receiving empathy, the world could become a better place in some ways.