The Lessons that Spoke to my Heart from Fruits Basket

Every time someone asks for anime recommendations, the first one that comes to mind is Fruits Basket. It is focused on a young girl named Tohru Honda who discovers that her classmate, Yuki Sohma, and his family members are possessed by the Chinese Zodiac animals. It is discovered that the Sohmas turn into their zodiac animals when hugged by someone who is not cursed, or when they feel stressed out. Apart from that, Fruits Basket is a show that teaches valuable lessons. It amazes me the way how almost every character in the show is able to have some impact on viewers. Each episode has an important lesson and for me there are three lessons that spoke to my heart.

Lesson 1: Being you is sufficient: Tohru lost her mother due to a car accident, and in the first episode, viewers see Tohru having a memory of what her mother had said to her: "You don't have to push yourself so hard. You don't have to do things the way I did. You can just be yourself. Do things your own way, one step at a time. You'll get there. I promise." This is a reminder that you do not need to go above and beyond to feel like you are enough. Personally for me, I always felt that I had no value because of the fact that I did not have a job, it is what I was made to think because of my dad who would always say that people who do not work are a failure. But now, I came to the realization that having a job does not mean a person can feel complete. You can have a job, work over time, be an excellent employee, but that does not determine your worth. I pushed myself so hard just to prove I am not a lazy person, but the reality is that there is no such thing as perfection. Now all I focus on is doing things in a way that bring me peace. Being you is sufficient means that you do not do things a way that will make others consider you to be enough.

Lesson 2: Do not only keep the memories that made you happy, but also the memories that hurt you: Momiji Sohma, who is the rabbit of the Chinese Zodiac, reveals to Tohru that his mom's memory was erased because she could not stand to have a son that was cursed. She is disgusted with Momiji and does not have second thoughts about having her memories erased. All memory of Momiji is erased and in the present day she has no idea she is his mother. Momiji teaches us that we should keep the memories that wounded us because one day those memories would allow us to have a better understanding of why things occur, and it will help us become stronger than the pain we endured. There are many events in the past that caused me deep scars, but those memories I have of those events helped me to gain knowledge on what I should do in the future if I ever feel like I will be in similar situations. One memory I have is when my ex best friend who I met in college stopped talking to me without giving me an explanation; I was obviously confused and hurt, but from that I learned that even though friendship sometimes do not last forever, that does not mean that what me and her had is no longer special. To me, she will always be someone I am so proud of despite no longer speaking.

Lesson 3: If you are in search of validation, do not look for it in those who will keep bringing you down: In the anime, it is obvious how much Kyo, who is also a Sohma, wants to beat Yuki, Kyo is also cursed with the Chinese Zodiac. He has so much anger toward Yuki because he is the rat, and in episode one it is discovered that the rat played a trick on the cat, making him miss the banquet that was for the zodiac animals to attend, so instead of thirteen animals, it was twelve. He is jealous of Yuki because he beats him at everything, and his goal to be accepted as a member of the Sohma family is filled with struggles due to constant needs to be validated. However, Tohru admires Kyo so much and tells him he has great qualities within himself. One of the quotes that really spoke to my heart was from Tohru; she says: “Maybe the reason you don’t see it is that it’s stuck to your back. What I mean is, a person’s admiral qualities, they’re just like, say, a pickled plum on a rice ball. In other words the person’s the rice ball and the plum’s stuck to their back. So, all over the world you can have rice balls made with all sorts of wonderful ingredients, all different flavors and shapes and colors, but since they’d be stuck in the middle of everyone’s back, someone could have a plum and not even know it. They’d look at themselves and think “I’m so plain, nothing but white rice,” even though it isn’t true because, turn them around and, sure enough, there it is. There’s the plum. So if someone is jealous of somebody else, well, then, it’s probably because it’s easier to see the plum on someone else’s back than it is on your own. Yup. I can see it. I can see it very clearly, Kyo. You don’t know it but you have a great big plum on your back.” This reminded me of a time when I would do anything to make my dad proud, but no matter what he made it so obvious that he preferred my half sister. It broke my heart hearing my half sister throw harsh insults at me because despite the fact that me and her did not have a bond, I still respected her and always said good things about her. I used to have this mindset that it was important to get validation from people who have the same blood as me, but the truth is that being related should not make you desire to be accepted. Instead, now I focus on having bonds with people who take the time to notice the good qualities in me but also want me to become a better person and instead of belittling me, they give me advice on how to grow as a person.