The First Dance

I do not dance unless forced to. Before I reached University, dancing was relegated to films and TV series, watching the Carlton shuffle or Tom Cruise effortlessly perform a classic dance to impress a woman. I was a voyeur when it came to the art and was very happy about that. Then came University and most recently, my wedding.

University

Aged eighteen and single I headed to the clubs like a wolf who smelt blood. I was drawn in by pheromones like a moth to the flame. I was young, dumb and full of...Well, you can finish that sentence.

My University years were key in shaping the man that I am today. I met my friends, achieved two degrees and learned how to blend in when dancing (which could be debatable). It was the time in my life when I realised that t-shirts are not attractive.

Unlike most of the people reading this entry, I did not lose my virginity at University. I was a virgin when I arrived and continued with that badge of honour until the age of 22. At this point, I cut my hair in order to get a job and as it turned out, a woman (at least for an evening).

After three years of unsuccesfully trying to convince women that I was a worthy investment, I found my 'salvation' when I was not looking. With an old housemate and a chance encounter. After a year or so with no contact she came back into my life following the shedding of my hair...and on a night out she ended up kissing me and taking me back to hers.

Whilst my memory of that night is a little foggy, I do remember that it was the shedding of my hair and willingness to engage in the dance which did it. Once only but for the first time, I feel as though I did okay, but she would probably have an alternative viewpoint.

My point with this story is to illustrate that none of us can avoid dancing in our lives. Whether at home with a partner, involuntarily with the music or to blend in with the jungle on a night out, we cannot avoid it, no matter how much we would like to.

My Wedding

I was married to my wife last year. The happiest moment of my life and one to cherish, yet our first dance was memorable for other reasons. It was a dance that we hadn't managed to practice as much as we would have liked to, owing to the constraints of the various hotel rooms we ended up in.

We had spent the two weeks running up to the day practicing in our small living room and following on from that, hotel rooms. At times we hit the side of the bed and at other times we landed on the bed. The point is that we were provided with less space than we needed.

On the night itself we ended up making everyone laugh, as the dance turned into a series of failed lifts and chants. We were out of time and subsequently missed each and every cue but we kept trying, managing one at the very end.

The important consideration here is that we tried. Most people simply sway but that was not good enough for us. You only get married once and therefore, we wanted to make it memorable and ensure that we tried something different.

The dance failed in terms of the stereotypical view of a wedding dance but we made people laugh. We have this amazing memory to pass along to our children and we did it with smiles on our faces. We had no illusions of being the best but we simply wanted to give it a go and give it a go we did.

The Power of Dance

On International Dance Day I remember the fun that I have had dancing. Regardless of how awful I feel that I am at the activity, each memory is met with a smile. Whether from a night out or at a wedding, each and every dance is a memory and a great one at that.

I feel as though everyone crosses paths with dance in their lives. Either through watching others or being drawn onto the floor. We have all crossed paths with this necessary evil and whilst I try to avoid it as much as possible, I probably shouldn't.

Dance is something that can heal a broken heart and for a moment, provide hope to a sick patient or someone in a care home. Dance is a rhythm which can snap us out of our everyday lives and provide us with a clean slate. A reason for being that brings us back to basics and enables us to smile.

A Final Thought

I won't ask for you to share your dances as that would be a little odd. I have shared an image from my first dance as I am proud of what we attempted. It didn't technically work but it did bring a smile to the face of every single human being who was in attendance. Whether or not they were laughing at the calamity, I know that everyone was laughing with us.

International Dance Day is a day to break down barriers and pay tribute to everyone living around the world. To the history of the world and not the whims of tyrants. It is a key date in the calendar for our mental health. To laugh at ourselves when the world offers such as serious exterior and remind us that it could be worse, to be grateful for what we have.

I will never become a professional dancer. I will never sign up for a competition but I can flip the perception on its head. From fear to one that I embrace in order to create unique memory that helps not only myself smile but every person around me.

I want to embrace dance rather than fear it. I want to walk into a dance smiling rather than running away.