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Think of Others First

It should be so simple

By Ben ShelleyPublished 2 years ago 5 min read
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Think of Others First
Photo by Andrew Thornebrooke on Unsplash

As I write this we are living through a cost of living crisis, the war in Ukraine and a global pandemic. Life has been flipped on its head and like it or not, we are all attempting to navigate through a world in crisis.

Something that is most likely not news for many but we can get lost in the troubles and forget to take a step back. I have and all I can think is that I do not understand. I do not understand why we cannot think of others first. It annoys me day to day and war is a collapse of such a mantra.

Day to Day Life

I am not involved in the war. I am not on the ground but my thoughts do go out to all those affected and it is for this reason that I do not understand why some dismiss it.

It is not on 'our turf', yet it affects other humans and therefore, I will never understand how people do not want to think about it. The war affects our species and whilst we are not going to be sent to the frontlines we can keep the conflict front of mind and consider our own actions.

  • Are we unable to think of others in a social media world?
  • In a world where we are surrounded by lies and deception, are we unable to think past the whole and look at our actions on the ground?
  • As we ignore our neighbours, leave problems for others and walk away from any conversation that we consider to be too difficult?
  • Is the ultimate gift that social media has provided to us, selfishness?

I was raised by a single Mum and two Grandparents. I have never met my Dad and I am glad of that, as through my Grandad I learned the mantra that would push my life forward, 'Think of others first'.

This was not taught to me as a means of avoiding challenges, with it being easier to focus on others, it was handed over to provide a foundation for what I call, my life.

An Entitled Life

At this point in time, I live in London with my wife. We are provided with a lower-middle-class lifestyle from our jobs, yet are years away from being comfortable. Despite these challenges, we are lucky in what we have.

Many others are not as lucky and it is for that reason that we are grateful for what we have and look to never forget that for a moment. We can order a takeaway during a pandemic and have someone bring it to us. We can afford to that but many others cannot.

Everywhere I look I see entitlement, from the Prime Minister to our neighbours who have others to clean for them. A sense of entitlement that sees them buy numerous gifts for their children which never get used, as we hear screaming every other weekend. Money cannot purchase love and yet the sense is that it can for many, either due to the consideration that is how they were brought up or that they do not have time to invest.

Time is one of the most valuable commodities in life and we oftentimes forget that. We can get so swept away in our daily lives that we forget to craft long-lasting relationships and get to know those around us and even if we do not, we should consider their feelings. Do not fill the bins up to brim with all of your stuff and leave no space for your elderly neighbours. Do not take up more than one seat on a train with your luggage as you do not want to sit next to another.

We are all human and should consider the feelings of those around us and not just ourselves as that is selfish.

  • How would we like it if we moved into a property and had to run out to use the rubbish bin on collection day?
  • How would we like it if someone was thumping on the horn as they were stuck in traffic behind you?
  • How would we like it?

Maybe it is Just Me?

Maybe holding the doors open for others, ensuring that everyone has a fair opportunity to use the services provided and that we don't push in front of others are old-fashioned considerations. Maybe I was born in the wrong century and I should simply look to not gather the thoughts of those around me and that I should be content with taking what I want? Maybe that is what this century is about, looking after number one?

I certainly hope not and will champion old fashioned values until the day I pass. I will not cease in my desire to make a difference in the world by considering others first and ensuring that I never take advantage of another. If I borrow money then I pay it back and if I am sharing a resource with a neighbour then I make sure that they have the chance to use it as much as I do.

I want to ensure that I am the type of colleague who supports those around me. I want to ensure that I am the type of friend who offers a two-way conversation and that I am the type of son who looks after his Mum.

A Final Thought

It was a lesson that I never forgot and hope to never forget across my life that you should think of others first, as it would alleviate a lot of problems. Being selfish is never the answer as there are so many of us that inhabit this world, with those on your doorstep being potential friends rather than bitter enemies. To live with people rather than in conflict seems stupid like building walls around countries, it prevents progress and holds us back.

I pride myself on thinking of others first. I want to be remembered as the guy who thought of others first and didn't simply take what he wanted. That he was someone that could be relied upon rather than avoided in public. I want to be remembered as someone with an opinion that was based on the needs of the many and not the thoughts of the few.

I believe in working together rather than in silos and the key thing to always remember is that you should think of others first.

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About the Creator

Ben Shelley

Someone who has no idea about where their place is in this world, yet for the love of content, must continue writing.

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