My 3 Fs For Dealing With Toxic People

Toxic people are out there waiting to ruin your day. They can be an old friend, a neighbor, an acquaintance, or someone you love and trust. It sometimes seems like you can’t escape the dangers of toxic people.

So, do you deal with toxic people in your life? The most important thing you can do is productively deal with them. That’s because human toxic syndrome is contagious, and the last thing you want is to become toxic.

There are three f-words that you can use to escape the world of toxic people. No, they aren’t the same word used in three different ways. All though, a good F*** you can come in handy when dealing with super toxic people. Without becoming toxic, here are the three words and ways to deal with toxic people.

Dealing With Toxic People

How do you start dealing with any problem? You have to identify and root it out of your life. In the case of toxic people, you start by finding out what their problem is.

Toxic people didn’t start as toxic. When people become toxic it’s usually because of a series of circumstances that not everyone is aware of. In the workplace, it can be burnout, passed over for promotion, lack of belief in the organization, and signs of stress or mental health problems.

At home or in your personal life, it’s important to ask yourself what they were like before things turned problematic. Were they toxic and you missed the signs? An example is the very pretty girl that took your breath away and then turned into an ugly nightmare you were desperate to escape from.

Sometimes, due to love and affection, toxic people take the reigns in our lives and run things into the ground. This and the reasons stated above are why tip #1 is important.

Tip #1: Find The Toxic Person’s Problem

The second thing to do when dealing with Toxic people is harder than finding and identifying toxic people and the source of the problem. While many relationships can be worked on, and people can be guided to do better, there is one key component to putting the issue behind them and you.

Once you have found the problem that had you suffering from toxic human syndrome, and you have worked out the issues, you have treated the problem. Treatment is not a cure.

To keep a toxic person on the right track there’s an imperative that they stay that way. However, if their past behaviors continue to be brought up, they may become angry, resentful, and unhappy about the situation. Many unhappy people turn toxic. You’ve done the work to help this relationship and this person. Why risk the toxicity returning?

Forgiving them for their past slights or behaviors is a tough, but sometimes necessary, decision you’ll have to face. How much of the person’s past behaviors can you forgive? Did things get too far before turning a corner?

However, Tip #2 is Forgiveness. If you want to maintain a relationship that someone turned toxic in, and they’ve turned a corner, you have to also forgive their past behaviors and move forward. Otherwise, the work you put in to fix the relationship was for nothing. The toxic behavior will return if you don’t let go of the past and hold it over them.

Tip #2 Forgiving The Toxic Person’s Past

If all else fails, and you fear that the person is not going to change, you’re faced with the third solution to fixing the problem. It won’t be their problem, but rather yours. Sadly, that is where things ultimately end.

Whatever the person’s toxic traits were causing at work, home, or in your personal life, they can negatively affect your mental health and wellness. Anybody who has ever had a spouse or lover turn 180 degrees on them knows the effects of betrayal, loneliness, sadness, and depression. Marriage may be the most important relationship in a person’s life, but there are others.

When bosses turn against you for no reason, and you hear them talking about you unprofessionally behind your back, you’re in a toxic relationship. When friends turn on you over jealousy, competition, or perceived slights, your relationship turns toxic. Colleagues may seem out to get you after you achieve a measure of success. Again, things turned toxic.

Sometimes, there is no way to fix a relationship once it’s damaged. Those people that are toxic to your life don’t see themselves doing anything wrong. People have their agendas, and if they have to trample a friend or are using a person in a romantic relationship, as long as they get what they want they don’t care about the damage they do.

These people lead to tip #3. The third F means to forget them. As we grow as people we mustn’t get bogged down by the influences of toxic individuals in our lives. While you may not be able to forget them, throughout your day you can mentally forget the things they’ve done, and work toward erasing them from your circle. This is the hardest of the Fs, but an important one to remember when all else fails.

Tip #3 Forget Toxic People’s Influence

Those are the three Fs of dealing with toxic people. Use them against the toxic influences you encounter. They can be used separately. You can use #3 to forget the toxic clerk in a store that is always gossiping. #1 and #2 can be used and never have to use #3 if you’re lucky.

We know they’re out there. Good luck in your future toxic encounters, and remember, not everybody you encounter sucks as much as the one that sticks out in your mind.