It’s Okay Not to Get Married

There are women who dream to wear the bridal gown and be led to the altar by their father, and there are also men who dream of legalizing their relationship. But it’s perfectly fine if you don’t connect with it.

We live in a world that is constantly changing, with people who are changing, especially mentally. More and more people are now seeing marriage as a thing of the past, and they are focusing more on improving their relationship with their partner than on legal contracts, in order to ensure their own happy ending.

Marriage is no longer legally required. Alternatively, there are so-called domestic partnerships, which provide the same rights as to marriage.

The cost of a wedding can sometimes be much higher than expected, leading you to give up the idea of getting married.

Furthermore, more people are unwilling to marry because they are afraid of divorce.

Clarissa Sawyer Lecturer in Natural and Applied Sciences, teaching gender psychology and adult development and ageing said:

“Women around the world are getting married later and part of that is because women are getting more educated and investing in their careers.”

“They’ve invested a lot of time and money into college, so they’re getting a job and delaying marriage — if not opting out completely.”

According to a Pew Research Center study “Millennials are less likely to live with a family of their own than previous generations were at the same stage of life” and “Three-in-ten Millennials live with a spouse and child compared with 40% of Gen Xers at a comparable age”.

People are subjected to a lot of pressure to marry in today’s society. When they see a couple dating for a long time, one of the first questions they ask is, ‘‘And… When are you going to get married?’’

They don’t ask if your relationship is going well or if you’re happy with your partner; their chief concern is when you’ll get married.

The thing is that society will never stop asking you for these things and putting pressure on you if you are not married ‘‘When you’ll get married?’’ after you got married ‘‘When you’ll have the first child?’’ after the first child was born ‘‘When you’ll have another child?’’ after you have two children ‘‘When you’ll get a bigger house?’’ and the list can go on.

The truth is that you could never stop tongues from wagging.

It’s okay not to get married if you don’t feel right about it. If you have doubts about your relationship, it is okay to not marry. It’s okay not to get married if you’re not sure.

Getting married is a decision that you must make when you are absolutely certain that this is the next step in your relationship, not because it would seem to be the next logical step.

It is your right to decide when and with whom you will marry, and other people, relatives, or society have no reason to press you or choose for you. After all, you have a life to live, not a society to impress.

When you’re unsure whether to marry or not, ask yourself the following questions:

1. What are my reasons for getting married now?

2. How will marriage influence my physical, emotional, and financial relationship?

Congratulations if you discovered more parts in your favor of getting married! I hear bells ringing and I am extremely happy for you.

But if you discovered more reasons to avoid marriage, that’s fine; your life doesn’t end here. As I’ve always said, it’s wiser to prevent a wedding than to go through a divorce.

In a nutshell, marriage is not for everyone. If you don’t want to get married, don’t let societal pressure and a piece of paper ruin your life. It is totally alright to choose not to marry.

You don’t have to be conditioned; you’re free to love in whatever way and with whomever you want. In fact, we all need to love and be loved unconditionally.

The story was firstly published on Medium.