If I were Putin's ma dukes, he would be a different and nice guy.

If I was Putin's mom, I would have put the fear of OG God in him. I would have busted his bottom very hard and strong and long when he gets on that pinky & the brain shit. I would tell him how far-fetched it is for him to conquer the world and who does he think he is? Dr. Evil? He must think he is doctor Evil from Goldmember in the movie. I love Goldmember the movie, I just might watch it on you-tube after I finish this story for the hell of it.

If I was Putin's mama I would crack that whip I would open a can of whoop Putin's booty, then fatten him up so he can be a ton or two therefore he would leave Ukraine alone. I am salty that Russia is putting Ukraine through bullcrap, just to conquer them, pick on them, and take what is theirs. Not fair for real it is not cool. I cannot wait to see my bands and my weight up perfectly done with perfection. Meow.

Swear Putin is lucky I am not his ma dukes, I would have driven that sob up a wall. I would have had that jerk off laughing and crying at the same time like a pregnant lady. Laugh out loud. I would have turned up on Putin if he was my kid and it would be a nonstop turn up. I would make him eat raw turnips for breakfast lunch and dinner until he lost sight of being a modern-day pinky and the brain. And when he was old enough I would make him do all of the raw turnip prep and laugh at him while he pigs out on turnips all day like a silly billy. I would get a couple of his ribs taken out by a surgeon to make sure when Putin gets stupid horny he can suck his own dick just to shit in a Louis Vuitton diaper. His classmates then would get to take him to the principles office to file a complaint about Putin blowing his own knob like corn on the cob.

I think this retarded shit I am writing is so damn funny, If vocal + admin does not turn this funny ass shit into a movie and pat me on the back with big bucks for this I would feel very sorry for them. No harm intended admin. sorry if you find me any least bit offensive I just hope to make some bigger bucks and make people laugh. What is wrong with attempting to make people bust a gut laughing their donkey kongs off. I was just reading one of Lightning Bolt's best using my author's platform and I laughed more than I have in a very long time. I thought what I was reading was hilarious. Thanks, Lightning Bolt, you cheered me up today, you also inspired me to be a better writer.

I go through writer's block in the worst way per day and I look for inspiration using vocal+ per day. I love it when I find decent inspiration to brighten my day and help me do much better as a writer and author. I struggle per day in that one way and I pray that I get much better at being an author than I have been. I am super critical of myself and my styles of writing, wow I just took my contact lenses out and put my spectacles on and I feel different Like my glasses work somewhat better than my contact lenses. My eye pressure has been up for some time and left untreated. I hope my glaucoma situation is not growing much worse. I bet the next time I go to Walmart Vision Center they will have to start me on prescription eye drops for my eye pressure.

Please all enjoy. Thank you.