How to Stop Yourself from Crawling Back to Your Ex: A Guide

Do you ever look back on your memories with your ex? All the good times you’ve had with each other and the secrets you shared — you've gone through so many things together that you can’t help but feel nostalgic.

Those precious memories are indeed one for the books, but that doesn’t mean you should go knocking on your ex’s doorstep. You might be the only one staying up late thinking about what you once had. Your ex has probably already moved on.

It’s high time that you focus on yourself and work on getting over your past relationship. There’s so much more to life than a single person who broke your heart. You might even find someone much deserving of your love in the process.

To get a move on with your life, here are a few ways you can prevent yourself from running back to your ex.

Don’t Hold Out Hope That You’ll Get Back Together

Even when things have already ended, you can’t help but have a bit of hope that you can patch things up. It’s understandable, especially if you still hold strong feelings for them.

You have to accept the bitter reality that you may not be able to get back together. You’ll only find yourself heartbroken the second time. Setting your expectations high will only lead to disappointment.

To squash out any hopes that you have, remember why you broke up in the first place. Think of all the stress you went through and the pain you had to tolerate. Do you still want to go back to that?

There's no point in pursuing an already failed romance. You’ll only end up in a dead-end relationship, a rut where you keep going back to each other without making any improvements.

Cut Off Contact

The first step towards achieving peace of mind is to cut off communication. Block their number. Find ways to make it impossible for them to contact you.

Resist the urge to talk to them no matter how hard they try to reach out. You need to have a clear mind when you decide whether you still want them back in your life. Once you think you’re ready, then you can resume contact and give proper closure to your relationship.

Take Time Off From Mutual Friends

There’s nothing wrong with keeping in touch with common friends. They don’t deserve to be ignored when they have nothing to do with your breakup. That is unless they are directly involved.

You can still meet up with them, but you don’t have to force yourself. You’re still trying to get over your ex, so it’s understandable if you need some time for yourself.

Let Yourself Grieved

Your heart can’t help what it feels. Bottling all your emotions inside will only make the pain persist. If you want to be able to heal, then you should allow yourself a moment of weakness.

Cry it out. Shout to your heart's content. Let those emotions out, both the good and the bad. Only then will you be able to get over it.

Don’t let the bitterness take over. While your feelings are as valid as anyone else’s, just don’t get carried away. Getting consumed by negative emotions will only pave the way to a negative life.

Learn where to stop. Change your priorities and focus on finding your own happiness.

Find a Healthy Distraction

Are you feeling down? Do you feel frustrated that you could knock down an entire bottle of vodka?

Though that sounds like a very tempting idea, it’s best if you refrain from doing so. Not only will your kidney thank you, but your future self will very much appreciate it too.

It’s fine to wallow in your own sorrows, just don’t let them ruin you. Find something you can temporarily fixate on instead.

A book, a game, or maybe a hobby that you just recently discovered. Whatever it is that works for you. It won’t take away the pain, but it will help you take your mind off it — temporarily. But that's better than going insane, right?

Go Soul Searching

Having low self-esteem is what causes most people to run back to their ex. You’d probably think that your ex is your last shot at love, but that isn’t the case at all. You’re forgetting the most important form of love — self-love.

The desire to be loved is what makes us form bonds with people. You rely on their validation and their attention to make you feel secure. However, it's not a very stable way of life.

To love others, you have to love yourself first. You have to be secure in yourself and not rely on one person to keep you going.

Find yourself. Go soul-searching.

It might sound like something out of a cliché breakup movie, but it does help a lot. You get your head off a lot of things, and you feel a lot freer. It’s a step closer to realizing your worth and establishing your own identity.

Once you get around finding your purpose and place in life, your ex will be the very last thing on your mind.

Meet New People

Your ex isn’t the only person in the world that can make you happy. You may not realize it, but many people around you care deeply about you. You just don’t see it.

These people are your family, your friends, or maybe even your coworkers. They are the ones that help you get by your day in their own little ways. Whoever is most important to your life right now, hang out with them.

You can also try to make new friends. Find people with interests similar to yours. In no time, you’ll find something to look forward to every day.

There are tons of people online who are looking for companionship, both platonic and romantic. You don’t necessarily need to jump the gun and commit. It’s all up to you to choose which direction to take.