Does Marriage Counseling Really Work (What Is The Success Rate For Marriage Counseling)

Do you feel like your marriage has reached a point that professional help is your only recourse? Have you every wondered if marriage counselors possess the power to fix the marital problems that you and your spouse cannot? How effective is marriage counseling, really? A lot of married couples resort to it when they feel that they have already exhausted all the possible ways of reaching a solution to the problems of matrimony. And while marriage counseling does fix certain problems, there are still some incidents wherein it seems to be more of a harm then help. Like most professional and methodological approaches to reaching a solution, marriage counseling has its own set of pros and cons. Of course, majority opinion is that you won't really know the answer to the question "does marriage counseling work" unless you yourself would try it out. However, marriage counseling can be expensive and it might not fit the kind of lifestyle you and your spouse you have. Some husbands do not believe in counseling, and the wives might be persistent. In this case, having a marriage counselor becomes another problem for the couple to face. Below is a simple take on the apparent pros and cons of marriage counseling.

Pro: Outsider's view

Husbands and wives often become too cooped up in their complicated web of disagreements and misunderstandings that they would need someone from outside the situation to clear up the smoke and help them reach a possible solution. In this case, marriage counseling could be their best bet. Apart from the fact that they will they be guided by a professional who is well aware of the techniques in achieving marital bliss, having a marriage counselor will save them from the burden of sifting through their marital woes without having to add more fights and disagreements as they undertake the process. Couples also become blinded by their emotions that they will fail to spot holes in the situation and possible solutions that are most likely hovering above their heads already. In such cases, an outsider's point of view is essential and it gives you a resounding YES as an answer to the question of "does marriage counseling work?"

Con: Possibility for error

Does marriage counseling work and is it error-free? Of course, it isn't. The main problem with it is that you can't really tell your counselor what happens in your relationship 24/7 when you only have an hour or two of counseling. This makes you summarize points and there exists the possibility of you leaving out pertinent points that could help the counselor in drawing out better conclusion, and ultimately, sound advice. There is a margin for error, and unfortunately, in most relationships, even the slightest of mistakes can cause an inevitable separation.

Pro: Intervention

If couples could work out their marital problems on their own, then there would be no need for counseling now, would there? But the problem is that they can't. They need someone to actually step in and intervene. In this regard, marriage counseling works. A professional intervention forces the couple to take a pause and welcome outside help.

Con: Timeliness and efficiency

Does marriage counseling work only on a specific period in the marriage and is its efficiency tested and proven? The main problem is that marriage counseling is perceived to work only on certain times within the relationship. Sometimes, it's too early to have marriage counseling. And other times, it's too late. When this happens, counseling is an obvious waste of time and energy for the couple. There's a proper time to heed the call for marriage counseling and much of its efficiency depends on this. Couples must bear the humility of admitting that they cannot patch things up---and fast. But they must also try to fix things on their own first. Not everything can be put on counseling. You cannot rely solely on it. After all, your marriage counselor is just a guide. The miracle worker would still be the couple itself.

How To Stop The Divorce - Five Helpful Hints

The statistics on divorce rates across the country are abysmal. Did you know that the average percentage rate of divorce across the United States every year is thirty-three percent? Don't let yourself become a statistic ... learn how to stop the divorce before it even becomes an issue. A successful marriage does not have to be against the norm. By following the helpful hints below, you can arm yourself with the power on how to stop the divorce.

1. Set aside a time every day to connect with your spouse. One way on how to stop the divorce is to utilize that chunk of time you carve out of your day to communicate with one another. Make sure that you have a time where there are no interruptions. If you have children, you might not want to make that time frame for communication right after a spouse gets home or while the kids are underfoot. That is just setting you both up for failure and is not the way on how to stop the divorce. Communication and making time with your spouse is important and provides a perfect outlet for you both to express your feelings and thoughts about what has happened throughout the day.

2. Respect your spouse's "personal" rules. Basically what this means is that you each have your own way that you wish to be treated and different ways that you feel loved by the other. For instance, you may feel appreciated and loved by your spouse actually telling you verbally. However, your spouse may feel appreciated and loved by the things that you do for him. Respecting and acknowledging each person's preferred style of showing emotions goes a long way on how to stop the divorce from happening.

3. One important method on how to stop the divorce proceeding from happening is to compliment and regularly show your appreciation for them. Making each other feel good is a surefire way on how to stop the divorce. Tell your spouse that they look good today; stick a note in their briefcase just to say that you are thinking about them. Leave a message on their work voice mail. There are a number of ways to compliment them and show them that you care.

4. Remember your wedding vows and remain faithful is tops on how to stop the divorce from ever happening. Nothing kills a relationship faster than infidelity. The trust is gone and it is so hard to recapture those feelings of love that you once shared. Numerous interviews and research studies with couples who have been married for over forty years all have one common element on how to stop the divorce - they all agree that no matter how bad things got, they always remained faithful to their partners.

5. Take care of yourself and look good. If you feel good and are confident in yourself, those feelings are transferred to your spouse. Think of marriage as a never-ending project, always having to tweak things to maintain equilibrium. How to stop the divorce is to keep it from ever occurring to either one of you. Stay healthy, take the time to groom yourself and make yourself appear attractive for your spouse. In other words, do the things you did while you were dating! These efforts help keep those home fires burning!

How to stop the divorce from even becoming an issue takes a lot of hard work. You have no time to become complacent in your relationship. That is when things go wrong. If you and your spouse are fighting more than usual or not communicating at all, take the time to sit down and discuss what is going on. You may find yourself drawing closer together and that is the best option on how to stop the divorce from even happening.

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