Do not allow anyone to criticize your high standards

After being single for nearly four years in a row, if there's one thing I've discovered, it's that having personal boundaries and upholding them can be the difference between being unhappy in relationships and not.

It can get quite complicated if you give in and allow your boundaries to be crossed. for everyone involved. And if you're anything like me, one of the most aggravating emotions in the world is not knowing where you stand with someone or your status in their life.

I've heard that my standards are "very high" and that's why I'm not dating anyone in the past. And I'm not going to lie—after hearing those remarks, I had some doubts about their veracity. Of course they weren't, though.

I've never believed that the ideal man exists, ever exists, or ever will. Nobody is perfect, and that is just the way things are. Everybody has a unique, wonderful defect. However, I do believe that setting your own boundaries for dating, relationships, and meeting new people is very appropriate.

I've whittled down my list of things I vow to myself I won't settle for in my future relationship beyond not being a nice human being after having made countless mistakes, behaving as a doormat for men, having my generosity taken for weakness, and allowing myself to be treated less than I deserved:

1.An absence of a relationship with God

This one should go without saying and is at the top of my list for a good reason.

2. Ineffective communication

I have had it with silly games. In my subsequent relationship with a man, there will be no tolerance for the silent treatment, excessively heated disputes, name-calling, or politeness. Whatever needs to be done, my spouse and I will feel comfortable discussing our needs and goals.

3. Deception

Unfortunately, I have had to deal with this practically every time I have interacted with a man. My generosity is frequently misinterpreted as weakness, and I believe that makes me vulnerable to being exploited. However, the truth always shines out before any competing beliefs. I won't put up with any more lies, no matter how tiny. Regardless of the situation, someone who truly has your best interests in mind will always tell you the truth. It is never essential to lie. I've said it.

4. A lack of endurance

Oh, this one, man. Anyone who knows me is aware of my frequent flaws and the need for patience while interacting with me. But this doesn't just apply to me; my spouse and I will also exercise patience with our relatives, friends, foes, strangers we pass on the sidewalk, and everyone else. I've previously had to defend my partners from some embarrassing actions, but never again. I deserve a kind person who isn't constantly in a hurry. Together, we'll enjoy every time we have left on earth.

5. Lack of openness

Last but not least, I place a high importance on a man who is open to new experiences, whether they involve concepts, cuisine, routines, activities, etc. I like to be pretty unplanned and enjoy spending time with my special someone. Making plans to do things or see each other has never been reciprocated, which has been one of my struggles in previous relationships. My suggestions were frequently rejected, or I was left to develop the plan on my own. I detested how I felt as a result. But thankfully, I have the ability, so it doesn't have to be that way. I'm looking forward to my future spouse communicating our schedule to me in advance without hesitation or inquiry.

Knowing that these things won't be sources of worry for me in my foreseeable relationships gives me a sense of relief. It's up to me to respect myself above all else by staying inside my bounds. If a man breaches any of them for the first time, I will say "NO." Even though there is still so much for me to learn and it is definitely easier said than done, all of the points I have made are quite doable.

Do not allow anyone to criticize your high standards. What will and won't make you happy is obvious to you. Stay true to who you are.