About Flirting, Why Are We Playing and How Harmful Is It to the Relationship?

Flirting - we all flirt, often without the slightest intention of taking things further, simply enjoying the game! Flirting amuses us and makes us feel attractive - and when we are alone, it can even lead to more serious things.

But flirting is not just for those without a partner: even those in a stable relationship play from time to time… Can flirting hurt in such situations and should people involved in a relationship refrain from this game?

Flirting - why are we playing?

Flirting strengthens our self-confidence and proves that we are (still) attractive in the eyes of the opposite sex! An innocent flirtation is often just a way to show ourselves that we are still attractive and that we can still find a partner (even if we already have a partner, it is comforting to know that we can attract other people of the opposite sex)! Seeing that you are considered attractive makes our ego tickle pleasantly and so we respond to playful looks like a compliment, flirting…

Flirting shows your partner that we are wanted by others! Sometimes, we respond by flirting with someone's attention and gaze just because we want to remind our partner how much we want to be! It is a small game that aims at the jealousy of the partner - we want to make him realize how attractive we are.

Flirting makes us feel better! It is an innocent game, a beginning of communication that gives us a state of well-being, security, and joy. Even if we often do not want to go further, a small game of eyes and smiles with meaning transposes us into a positive state of mind.

Flirting can be the beginning of an adventure or a relationship! Flirting is not always just an innocent game - sometimes it becomes the basis for more extensive communication and the beginning of a relationship (only sexual or more).

The only ones use flirting to see if they are considered attractive by the chosen "target" (so if they are answered) and to initially test erotic compatibility - through meaningful looks, then gestures and touches from the beginning, we realize how much the attraction between us and the other is intense if there is that "chemistry".

Flirting is a type of biologically programmed sexual behavior. Specifically, sometimes we can't help but flirt: if an attractive person of the opposite sex sends us certain signals, we will respond to them!

We cannot control the attraction we feel towards a person of the opposite sex, nor the primary, instinctual reaction of the body (researchers have shown that bodily reactions when we feel attraction and want to seduce are the same in all cultures). When we are attracted to someone, we instinctively want to attract that person in turn (without thereby wanting to create actual contact).

Flirting satisfies our emotional need for appreciation, for attention. The single ones, without a partner of the couple, find through games of this kinda part of the attention and appreciation they need. What about those who have a stable partner?

Well, when flirting is something that a person needs, to compensate for a lack of attention and appreciation, it is no longer such an innocent game! It is a sign that the relationship does not get everything the person needs! When you feel the need to flirt often because you do not feel appreciated and valued enough by your partner, it means that you are looking outside the relationship to satisfy an emotional need (not a good sign at all)!

So, is flirting harmful to the relationship? When we have a stable partner, do we have to refrain from this game? Everything is relative

Flirting sometimes just like a game that doesn't go away doesn't mean cheating or betraying! As long as it's innocent fun and there's no thought of taking things further, flirting shouldn't be considered a sign of betrayal or disrespect for your partner! But certain situations should be avoided when you are in a relationship!

Don't flirt with your partner - he may feel ignored and disrespected. If you start a game of looks, smiles, and gestures with a stranger while you are with your partner, you suggest that you find the other one more interesting and attractive! So, don't flirt unless you want to make your partner jealous (but don't be surprised if his reaction is not to your liking)!

Don't move on! If you're in a relationship, a little flirtation isn't a big deal - but only as long as you stop it in time, before intimate touching or long talk!

You need to know when to stop playing without encouraging the one you flirted with to continue - you need to refuse an intimate approach. A clear NO, when you are in a relationship, to sexual flirtation: sensual touching or sexual conversations!

When your partner is bothered by your flirtations… try to realize that even though it is nothing serious for you, he/she sees things differently! If you tend to flirt quite often with attractive people, the result is to make your partner feel insecure! Then, don't be surprised by jealousy attacks… So, if you see or are told that you are flirting too much, try to refrain…

When you feel that you better hide a flirtation from your partner… it means that in your mind you know that you did something wrong! If you feel that you are better off hiding and you feel a little bit like a fly in the ointment, it means that the idea of ​​taking things further came to you, even as a fleeting thought…

When you flirt often because you feel the need to be appreciated or to attract someone's attention when you feel that your partner does not give you enough attention or appreciation and fill the gap with small flirtations - ask yourself why you are looking outside the relationship for something you have to look first in the relationship!

Why doesn't your partner give you enough appreciation, attention? Talk to him/her and tell him/her how you feel, instead of trying to compensate by attracting the attention of strangers…