5 Truths From Being Intentionally Deceived

Have you ever loved somebody with such purity that you choose to see them in the brightest light possible regardless of their actions? Maybe you desire to love them so fiercely unconditionally that you’re willing to ignore red flags in an attempt to have a higher perspective of them. Perhaps even the idea of red flags annoys you because you want to give this person that you love the benefit of the doubt.

But what about when there’s constant fog surrounding the connection?

If somebody is manipulating you, you cannot expect them to be honest with you — ever. They may lay bits of honesty throughout your interactions to keep you thinking they’re vulnerable to you. This illusion of transparency builds your trust so they can continue to blow smoke and intentionally mislead you for their benefit.

Here are five truths I’ve learned from being intentionally deceived by people I was focusing my unconditional love.

1. You will not question somebody’s true motives if they are pure in their intentions toward you. There will be a willingness for clear communication to avoid confusion, keeping you both on the same page.

2.Their actions will match up with their words, and their words will match up with their actions. If they constantly say one thing and do another, it is to keep you confused and keep you foggy, second-guessing yourself. This behavior is a manipulation tactic known as GAS-LIGHTING, meant to make you question your reality and sanity to keep you in their grips.

3. They will stay CONSISTENT with you in their communication and efforts. If they leave you waiting, they keep you hungry, so when they feed you a bit of their time/attention, you will be desperately starving for that fake validation.

4. They won’t keep changing their story. They will not continuously throw you off track with different outcomes to the same experiences they keep discussing. Watch out for this as they will change their story to suit their needs instead of sticking to the truth—another way to keep you confused and unsteady.

5. They will not lead you on to believe something and then, if you attempt to address it with them, reject you to make you feel inferior and insecure. This is an attempt to control you and your emotions. It is not pure nor true love.

Why do people do this? You have an “it” factor that they want. They believe that to achieve that “it” factor, they need to control you. It’s a basis of insecurity. You do not owe anybody your time, especially if they are consistently manipulating you. It can be vital to speak your truth for your wellbeing, as stuffing emotions down can be destructive. However, if you’re going to confront somebody about manipulative behaviors, do not expect them to understand or agree with you. Don’t be surprised if they continue to manipulate you to make you feel crazy for thinking feelings were mutual. It is part of the manipulation routine and, instead of giving this person more chances, move on. There is much better for you. Let them grow without you because they don’t deserve you and will not be able to reciprocate. Kill the fantasy that they will suddenly become the version of themselves you wanted or believed them to be because that will hold you back from the genuine connections awaiting you.

Don’t be embarrassed or ashamed if you find yourself in these situations because it is part of learning how to love yourself unconditionally. The mirroring of these manipulative behaviors allows clarity to flow, allowing more love and light to fill your life!

You will never question where you stand with somebody with clear intentions. Please don’t wait around for them. Move on. You deserve that growth. Love never asks you to put your life on hold.

Loving me, loving you, loving life,
Brittney