I Spent Thanksgiving Alone

"This one year, it was more than necessary to show myself I wasn't alone even when it was just me, myself, and I."

I want to preface that I don't recommend this to everyone, you know yourself best. Holiday's can bring up a lot of emotions, and if you aren't in the right headspace to be by yourself please make sure that you reach out to someone. You are not alone, and your feelings are valid. That being said this is how my first ever Thanksgiving alone went.

This was my choice to spend the holiday alone, and I will admit that I did feel guilty at first for this decision. I know there are people who spend holiday's alone and it's not by choice and I don't want to discredit that. I feel extremely grateful for my family and their health, for me mentally this year I needed to think of myself first. Every year I dread the questions about my personal life, the comments on rather I lost or gained weight, the I am going on the ultimate diet at the first of the year conversation. The list goes on, and I wasn't in the right headspace to handle it this year. I feel that needs to be validated more in all situations, but holidays especially.

"You're not required to set yourself on fire to keep others warm."

Even though I felt guilty for not attending Thanksgiving dinner, I quickly realized that this was something I needed to do for me. I know that I will be thankful for taking this time to myself in the future. I began my night by ordering myself one of my favorite meals of steak, mashed potatoes gravy and a side of corn. I could have cooked for myself, but to be honest I just wasn't feeling up to it. After I had dinner, I turned on Spotify and sung to all of my favorite songs. The artist of the songs ranged from Van Halen, Motley Crue, Underoath, Slipknot, One Direction, Justin Bieber and everything in between. I have a very interesting taste in music! Having a solo concert is one of the most therapeutic experiences in my opinion. Once this was all said and done I really sat with myself, and reflected on what I was thankful for.

I will admit that I can be guilty of forgetting to be thankful for the simple things when I am so caught up wishing I had more than I do. But after everything that has went on for almost two years I am beginning to have a different perspective. This year the first thing I am thankful for is waking up in the morning. I am thankful for my health, having a roof over my head, a car to get me places, food in my house. A job that despite it not being the career I foreseen for myself, it still provides for me. Thankful for my friends and family, their health, and sticking by my side as I navigate my way through life. These may seem like the most simplest of things, but they are often the most over looked blessings.

"Some journeys take you farther from where you come from, but closer to where you belong."

I hope that no matter what your holiday season looks like this year, you can find happiness and peace. I hope that you know you're not alone, and whatever you're facing now won't last forever. The media has a way of making the holidays look a certain way to be happy. The truth is everyone's situation is different, and whatever your situation looks like is its own unique happiness. As hard as it can be, don't let commercials and media dictate your happiness this holiday season. The smallest blessing's in life will make you far happier, then a media outlet dictating what should make you happy.