Trust & Unconditional Love — Mindset Shifts that Serve Your Authentic Self

Going to therapy was my most time- and energy- consuming extracurricular activity in college.

As an efficient learner, I had excelled both in academics and in believing that I was not enough for this world (unless I really “toned it down”).

Graduation felt more like liberation than an accomplishment. I finally felt free of those academic boxes.

Yet, after graduating, I continued my lifestyle of cramming myself into new, non-undergrad boxes. I tried everything from drop-shipping to being a Swedish housewife. Nothing seemed to satisfy me.

In the past several months, I’ve been trying on a new set of beliefs in place of my old ones. I decided that I am allowed to be myself. I decided that I’m going to be myself first, and let life form around me.

Trust is the most important component here, and it’s one I had refused to engage with for most of my life.

I used to live my life constantly in fight or flight mode, as if every move I made would make or break my future. I was afraid of making any decisions before consulting my friends, teachers, mentors, and mental health professionals.

Now, I live by my decision to trust my inner guidance system. I trust that I already have everything I need to live a happy, fulfilling life. I trust that my ideas about my own life are correct, without any outside validation.

I refuse to believe that I am incapable of making good decisions for myself.

I refuse to believe that I was born for the purpose of suffering until I die.

I refuse to believe that I haven’t suffered enough to deserve a good life.

I trust that life is supposed to feel good.

Trusting in myself begins with acknowledging that I can neither predict nor prevent disaster.

I trust that I am able to handle any problems that come my way, because I’ve never failed to figure things out.

I trust that any mistakes I make along my path will be great material for my forthcoming bestselling memoir of my success story.

Worrying doesn’t solve problems. Worrying is the activation of problems.

I trust that nothing in life has to be taken as seriously as I might have thought before.

Trust in Others

I trust that what I perceive about another person is a reflection of my inner state of being.

I trust that what another person may perceive about me is a reflection of their inner state of being.

I trust that the people whom I love also love me and want me to succeed.

I trust that people can only understand me to the extent that they can understand themselves. I even recognize that if my past self were reading my writing now, she would probably roll her eyes at most of it (before going back to sulking in bed for an entire week).

I trust that anyone who judges me harshly will find a way to feel better about themselves soon, just like I did. I love to celebrate that we’re all growing.

I trust that no one is responsible for how I feel except me. I know that taking radical responsibility for my own wellbeing is what empowers me to show up as my best self for other people.

I trust that my writing will reach the people who are meant to read it. I trust that my writing can help heal others as much as other people’s writing has helped me to heal.

Trust has empowered me to surrender

So much of my brain power used to be spent contemplating questions that had no answers without Trust.

“Why am I here, on Earth?”

“Am I doomed to be mentally ill for the rest of my life?”

“Am I allowed to be who I really am?”

Trusting in my inner guidance has allowed me to answer these questions in ways that make me feel good. Really good.

In the past, I refused to make any conclusions about the world unless they were empirically verifiable. Unless someone else could see it, it wasn’t real.

Yet, the most real thing about my life was my own consciousness. Without it, nothing would be, for me.

I decided my emotions were my friends and not my enemies.

I realized that my past depression/mood disorder/(whatever the doctors felt like calling it) was a valid response to my (entirely false) belief that my purpose in life was to fit myself into other people’s boxes.

I decided that there are enough people in the world who fit into the boxes that were shown to me as options while growing up.

As a result of my dedication to myself, anything in my life that had forced me to be someone I’m not has naturally fallen away.

I’m rebuilding from scratch.

Even among the current emptiness I see around me, I feel happier than I have ever been in my life. I know that so many amazing things are coming to replace what has fallen away.

I know this because I won’t settle for anything less than what empowers me to be my true self.

I let go. I surrender. I unclench. I release. I Trust.