5 Signs That You Are Emotionally Healing

Healing from emotional wounds is some of the most meaningful work a person can do.

Even though I got into therapy pretty much as soon as I started college, I spent years repeating the same mistakes in various configurations.

After I graduated, I traveled the world, trying on various “life roles” until I finally ended up living with my parents again.

Ultimately, I realized that nothing in my outside reality could meaningfully shift until I finally did the work on the inside.

This was more than therapy had demanded of me.

Therapy showed me all the reasons I was screwed up in the head, which helped me justify my negative emotions as reflective of truth. Look how terrible my life has been! No wonder I’m such a mess!

What brought me to true healing was more than just pointing out my traumas and connecting the dots to my latest acts of self-sabotage.

Healing meant learning to actually let go of every belief that had been motivating me to betray myself over and over again.

It was realizing for the first time that what I thought about my own life mattered more than what anyone else thought.

It was taking radical responsibility for my own emotions and beliefs, and being radically self-compassionate along the entire way.

Here are some meaningful signs of healing progress that I’ve noticed in myself lately.

If you’ve noticed them in yourself too, I hope you remember to celebrate how far you’ve come in your journey.

You may be healing emotionally if…

1. You can’t help but feel gratitude about things you used to ignore.

In my darkest days, I’d probably want to punch myself in the face for saying this. Who cares about the little things when I’m miserable as hell?

Today, I can be moved to tears after smelling a flower. I greet the moon every time I see her. I regularly thank my freezer for its abundant supply of ice.

I enjoy the simplest experiences to the fullest extent possible: I’m a renowned chef while stir-frying a Trader Joe’s frozen meal, and I’m at the world’s most luxurious spa every time I take a shower.

In short, it’s now much harder to be miserable.

2. You see physical changes in your body.

I’ve lost around 70 pounds from releasing the metaphorical weight off of my soul’s shoulders.

This weight had many forms, including the self-inflicted pressure to “present well” to others.

Again, in my darkest, literally heaviest days, I’d have rolled my eyes at this idea. Yeah right, what does “calories in, calories out” have to do with the soul?

Yet, the most weight I ever managed to lose by dieting was around 15 pounds, after months of Weight Watchers.

I have to say, healing my soul from within was definitely a way more enjoyable strategy.

3. You are actually capable of meditating.

Many of us, including my past depressed self, could relate to this moment:

The word “meditation” used to be the ultimate groan-inducer for me.

Why would I sit by myself in silence? Don’t you know whoever’s talking in my head is really mean to me?

In the past, I wasn’t ready to face the idea that the “really mean voice” wasn’t actually me.

My understanding was that the really mean voice was me with a mental illness, a chemical imbalance in my brain that could be fixed with medicine and talking to an expert.

Medication and therapy eventually got me to a point where I was okay enough to do the emotional healing work I’m doing now.

One day, I felt worthy enough of being mentally well, not just surviving.

Only then was I able to understand the point of meditation and actually enjoy its benefits.

4. You feel more calm, and less shakeable.

Meditation showed me that I have much more control over my sense of inner peace than I could have ever imagined before.

As I regularly sat in silence for 10, 20, or even 30 straight minutes (my latest record!), I demonstrated to myself that I was in charge of my mind.

Soon, even when I wasn’t meditating, I could control my emotional experience much better than ever.

With my new powers, I started to observe my impulsive reactions in everyday life.

It started with small things: after being afraid of spiders my whole life and screaming any time I saw one, I decided to say hello and make peace with any spiders I’d see in my house (just don’t mess with me, ok?).

Before, I’d be shaken by even the smallest of unexpected problems or conflicts with others. Now, I recognize that people make mistakes and that we’re all trying our best.

Now that I prioritize the maintenance of my inner peace, it’s more difficult to push my buttons.

5. It feels good to celebrate your progress.

When I compare myself from even just a year ago to who I am now, I understand how truly meaningful my progress has been.

The really mean voice in my head still hangs out sometimes, but I am finally aware of the distinction between my ego and my true, highest self.

Transforming from the inside is so difficult to begin because of what’s considered “real” to the outside world.

After all, no one else can see nor experience what’s going on in your head.

Transformation began for me when I realized that I am the only one who is me, all the time.

No one outside of me truly understands even a tiny fraction of what I know about my own reality.

Now, I refuse to spend my energy on tirelessly explaining myself to the world. It feels great to celebrate that.

Now, I heal, I grow, and I share with love. I’m happy that you do, too.