Two Small Bags of Petzels and She Was Gone

The Flight Attendant handed me two small bags of pretzels from her aisle cart and smiled sweetly...

... then was sucked cleanly out through the gaping hole in the bulkhead.

I saw the soles of her shoes, worn but not old as she exited.

Christ, the look on her face was priceless like she had worried that this might happen, but given the odds and all – not something that kept her up at night.

The small oxygen tubes dropped from above and hung like Christmas lights on a winter’s eve.

Buffeted by the violent yawing of the plane. Swinging just out of reach for most of us. I grabbed mine. Strapped it to my head, then put one on the lady next to me.

There were screams of course throughout, but after a moment they all blurred together into one continuous wail. Like the winds howling off a lighthouse as a Nor’easter moved in.

The mind is an amazing mechanism really. Editing insane levels of input, trying to make sense of it all.

Adjusting the highs and the lows so it all seemed like a drill gone wrong, but with a chance that things would sort themselves out before too long.

****

I was hoping they would. I had decided late to take an earlier flight, so I’d get home the night before the wedding rehearsal. A little surprise for my brother and mom. Now that idea wasn’t sitting too well with me.

Had to downgrade from business class to standard - Saved money, and lost his life. A fitting epithet for my tombstone, I thought, if there was going to be one. I hadn’t prepared a will as yet, didn’t think a thirty-something needed to do that. Figured I had a bit of time.

However, I do recall telling my Mom I wanted to be cremated with my ashes thrown on Mr. Bellingham’s front lawn.

The prick chased me off it every day growing up. Always mowing it. All sprinkling some disgusting dust over the grass and flowers, killing the bees I swear. Littering the pavement out in front with their pitiful bodies. He didn’t care.

On his front lawn Mom, or his living room, if the window is open.

She laughed awkwardly. The thought brought chills up and down her spine. I regretted saying it as soon as the words were out. But there it was.

About 15 seconds after the flight attendant exited the plane, I could hear the captain saying something on the PA.

Ladies and Gent … there appears to be a dec … in pressure. We are making adjust … in the cockpit and hope to have …

That’s when the PA gave out or the captain did, not sure which.

All things considered; I was doing alright. The lady next to me, about 70 I'd guess, was holding my right hand and tapping each knuckle like a rosary bead, back and forth as the prayers left her lips.

I smiled. I had never been too religious. Had my own version of things and was comfortable with them. Didn’t interfere with others and their beliefs.

I remember once when I went to church with my great aunt and there was this couple who …

Well, maybe it'd be best if I left that one alone. I guess they had their reasons for shouting and praying out loud. Though I never understood what they were.

The plane was losing altitude. We were above the clouds a minute ago, though I could see still the large green crop circles below.

Now the angle of the plane’s descent made that impossible.

****

There was no smoke or no fires, no smell of cordite or whatever C4 smelled like. Just us, the plane and the Earth moving closer all the time.

I tried for a bit and finally reached my phone from the bag down between my feet. Typed out a quick text to Mom and James.

Love you – was all I could think of. Pushed send and hoped it would arrive.

I looked out the window one last time and noticed something a little different. The plane was starting to level off. Not a lot, but we were no longer a bullet heading straight toward Kansas.

The PA twitched for a second. The captain shouted something into the mic.

We’re trying to … tuck your heads between your …

That was it.

The lady next to me was still going at it. Considering that we weren’t descending quite as fast as before, I thought hell keep it up.

I thought about my brother and his soon-to-be wife, Jillian, and wished them well. He was a good brother and deserved her.

When I first met her, I ended up asking if she had a sister. I was impressed with who she was and thought, why not?

As it turns out she did and I was going to meet her tomorrow.

The plane gave an almighty thump. The wings snapped from side to side and I thought the ride was finally over. Everyone screamed. Everyone cried.

Then one more great jolt and suddenly things felt calm.

The emergency lights blinked off. The plane stopped shuddering and that’s all I remember.

Except for the captains last words – hold on.