The Painful Relationship With a Covert Narcissist

In the beginning:

The attention, oh god, the attention. At first, it will be great! But over time, it becomes overbearing and borderline annoying.

You feel like you met your lost soul you've been searching for your entire life.

Everything you like, they like. How is this possible? You will meet your twin of the opposite sex!

Clingy, almost too much. Well, ok, yea, it is annoying. But you finally found someone that sees you for you and appreciates you, finally! Bring it!

Sexually, you can't explain it unless you experience it. It's like a performance each time.

They seem to listen with ease and are really interested in you.

Every insecurity you ever had disappeared the moment you met them

They want to do everything with you. It's over the top but "cute" in a way.

They have a vulnerable side you can't pinpoint. Almost like something is off, but you will ignore it and run with it.

By the end?

Your flaws will come out, and all the attention you are getting will be withdrawn.

You will become a needy, clingy person that needs to get hobbies and friends. They can't be bothered with your needs right now.

Every insecurity they took away will be multiplied by 100.

The feelings they were so eager to hear about turned into your torture chamber. As of now, they are twisted and used against you. Your feelings are nothing more than an annoyance to them now.

The sex becomes almost robotic and distant. While it's still mind-blowing, you begin to sense the feeling of disconnect, and it's used as a tool for manipulation to draw you into a deeper trap.

That vulnerability they once showed comes sporadically. It will keep you guessing. When they NEED you, you will be there when you need them; good luck, you needy asshole.

One minute you're the best thing; the next, they hang up on you and ignore you. If you're lucky, even cheated on.

The open "book" the person once was, becomes a lasting secret of lies and deception.

Every logical concern you have will be met with gaslighting and projection unless it has to do with how great they are.

That feeling you couldn't "pinpoint" is hit with a bullseye. How they can shut you down and disappear in the blink of an eye will leave you dazed and confused.

You will begin to chase the very person that has done the most horrendous acts to you. You will justify it to yourself in any way you can to avoid the inevitable withdrawal from the trauma bond.

You will question yourself, "how the fuck did you let this happen!?" Why do I love someone that is mean as cat shit to me?

You will tell your story to anyone that will listen. Many will think you are bat shit crazy. They will not understand why in the hell you can't leave this. You will run friends and family off as you want to explain yourself "just one more time!"

You will start researching online, reading, watching videos, anything to explain what is going on. You may even question if you are the abuser. Maybe you're the narcissist? Right? Complete insanity.

The bottom line, no one can do it justice by writing or making a video about it. You have to EXPERIENCE IT! That's the only way to "know" what it's like.

Listen, we all have our shit to work on, and being with one of these toxic assholes will bring every trauma and character defect you have to surface. It's frightening! They will delicately lay it right on your lap as they smirk, turn and walk out the door.

It's unfortunate but fortunate at the same time. If you can push through this and make it about YOU and not the narcissist, you will come out the other side a changed person.

Some say it changed for the worse. But I don't believe that. I agree we are never the same, but it gives us a whole new outlook and perception of life and people in general.

Hopefully, you heal, become a better version of yourself, and be the voice for others that are struggling.

So, what is a narcissist like in a relationship? All I can say is you have to experience it to give it full justice.

The relationship with a Covert Narcissist can't be explained, only experienced.