Seasonal Affective Disorder

It was a little over a year ago now, I started feeling stressed with work, I felt like I was getting the job done but doing it enough or to my best standard. I wasn’t sleeping much at home, I was sitting up late most sits just overthinking things, scrolling through my social media and just letting time pass by, whenever I did get time to eventually fall to sleep, I’d be woken up about an hour or two later by my alarm.... another day I would be dreading I’d think to myself. However, I’d put a smile on, get up, shower, get my work uniform on, and sort my son out for school - who at this time was going through a referral for ADHD, I did my best, got him to school and went to work, hiding how I feel. I stopped speaking to people, only if it meant I had to for my job, and decided I would keep myself to myself. No one knew anything, they just thought I was a normal happy 24 year old.

A month had gone by, now at this time everything just piled on, the meltdowns my son was having, my feelings, I started putting more and more weight on because my diet just went out the window - I’d eat late, early hours or simply skip meals. Whenever I did eat, it would be an easy fix, chocolate, sweets, bread, crisps ... anything and of course, the fizzy pop, I started drinking about 4 250ml bottles at work, and come home and have at least 5 cans of pop before bed. I’d skip showering on the night time, just so I could get into bed and watch Netflix all night, my days off work I would just sleep - my bedroom was piling up with rubbish, dirty clothes, clean clothes and just a mess. But I carried on focusing on my son, and getting him through his time of need, he was always fed properly, washed properly and in bed at a decent time. One of us needed the correct looking after!

About a week later I decided enough was enough and I went to the doctors, which of course they then diagnosed me with Seasonal Affective Disorder - which effects people in the winter months of the year, everything my doctor said made me realise how much I needed the help. I took the tablets they diagnosed me with and went on my way, and the tablets helped! I started smiling again, this time because I actually wanted to smile! My room was cleaned up, I stopped stressing about things .... of course I had my bad days, because depression doesn’t just ‘dissapear’ however I knew the help was there. I did this for me, for a better life.

If you’re suffering, please do get the help that is available, even if it’s just a phone call to someone close to you, or visiting the doctors.

The help is there for us. #mentalhealthmatters 💋