Responding to Perceived Threats

The image above will make sense if you read the article, even the beginning.

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Most people have heard of the "fight or flight" response which is cause by the sympathetic nervous system. This is the opposite of the "rest and digest" response caused by the parasympathetic nervous system. What many people don't seem to be aware of is that "fight or flight" has been turned into "fight, flight, freeze, or fawn." I'm going to go slightly in depth about each of these with any resources linked at the bottom.

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Fight is when you believe you can overpower the threat. You may become physically aggressive with urges to try to defeat the threat, whether it is an actual threat or not.

Flight is when your body's desire is to run away from the potential threat. This can be the best course of action if there is a true threat such as a burning building (unless you are the firefighter who was called there, of course).

Freeze is when you just stop. You are not fighting but you are not fleeing either. The best comparison I know of is "a deer caught in headlights."

Fawn is when you try to please the person or thing causing the potential threat. This is common in people who grew up in abusive families, according to Simply Psychology.

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Some signs of fight include tightening jaw, urges to punch someone or something, feeling intense anger, crying, upset stomach, and attacking the source of danger.

Some signs of flight include excessive exercising, feeling tense or trapped, restlessness, darting eyes, and a sensation of numbness in the extremities.

Some signs of freeze include pale skin, sense of dread, feeling numb, decreased heart rate, and loud pounding heart.

Fawn is used after fight, flight, and freeze have been unsuccessful. The main sign of it is that you care more about making the other person happy than yourself. (I assume this has to do with being fearful of what the other person might do if they become angry or unhappy. I'm not positive about that though.)

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I had an incident at work where someone was seriously injured, possibly even killed. My response was to freeze. I was panicking so much that I didn't even get to the break room. I stood there in shock, I was horrified that if I helped, something would happen to me.

Two days after that incident, I had a meeting with my therapist. I ended up talking to him about it. It went something like this...

"After you found out about that, how did you feel?"

"I was scared. You know the fight, flight, or freeze response? I froze. I couldn't move or speak."

"What happened after? You said you were scheduled the day after. What did you do?"

"I went to work."

"So, it sounds like they fight response kicked in too. You were scared but went in anyways."

"Yeah, I guess so. I don't want anxiety to rule my life so I fight that battle on a daily basis. It is really, really hard but I work my ass off to fight that battle."

That conversation with him made me realize that I use way more fight than I use flight or freeze. I did not think that my battle with anxiety is a fight response on a daily basis. Learning that about myself was extremely surprising and interesting to learn about as a chronically anxious person.

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How do you most often respond to situations? I'm genuinely curious.

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