People You Shouldn't Trust

Surely you know more than one person who, from the mouth outwards, presents himself in one way, but with his actions expresses exactly the opposite, and many times, with intentions to harm. How to act.

Fake people are sometimes associated with those who are hypocritical as a form of behavior. The dictionary states that a false person presents "pretense of qualities or feelings contrary to those that are truly had or experienced" . In everyday behaviors, they are framed as toxic and harmful, since they do not follow good purposes towards others.

Although psychologists affirm that there are no categories that separate when someone is totally false, it has been defined that the most usual thing is that in certain facets of life they behave in that way, and in others they do not.

Some basic features

In general terms, someone who behaves falsely usually has an insecure personality , which leads him to act and mask his way of being in front of others.

As for hypocrisy, in this case the moral judgment on their behavior appears , since it shows what we commonly call a “double standard”. On the one hand, they can use beliefs that do not belong to them and act on them, and thus have a weak morality, because it does not start from their own convictions and values. Or, they change their minds and opinions depending on the occasion.

Some attitudes

As an example, these are some attitudes that show behaviors that may be false or hypocritical in front of others:

• They show a smile from the front , and criticize you mercilessly from behind.
• They change their behavior in front of you in a very notorious way.
• If you confront them, they say that the wrong person is you , that you are misunderstanding things.
• They focus on their own world and do not care what the person who is the target of their falsehood or hypocrisy feels.
• They constantly pretend in those situations.

• They adopt entanglements , lies, transcendence and gossip.
• They only approach in peace to get something in return.
• They appear in good times, and disappear in bad times .
• They ignore you and let you know so you feel it more.
• They promise too much , and they do not deliver on almost anything.
• They weave networks into which innocent people fall, with the sole purpose of entangling them and multiplying the effect of their falsehood.
• They do not answer calls or requests: they want to show superiority.

Tips for living with false and hypocritical people

As we surround ourselves with all kinds of people in the world, it is important to learn to distinguish and manage them. If you want to live more in peace with yourself, here are some ideas in case you have to share spaces with them:

• Question everything that a person you consider false tells you: their personality can deceive you and make you believe that they have good intentions, although in the long run they will reveal their tricks.
• If you can, avoid them : the most convenient thing is to remove these types of people from your life, since the only thing they will do is hinder your emotional world, and that you stay thinking and ruminating about their way of acting.
• If you cannot avoid them, have short interactions : in the event that it is not feasible to cut ties, you can choose who you will spend more time with and who less. Before people who have shown falsehood and hypocrisy with you, have brief interactions, the minimum necessary.
• Don't talk to these people until they don't: One way to cut harmful ties is to avoid initiating all kinds of conversations , requests, or relationships on your part. If something comes from your side, you will evaluate at that moment what you want to do.
• Set limits and say no : For many people, saying no is a big challenge; In the case of this type of person, it is convenient to train yourself in this, to feel with the right to express it with total clarity and without hesitation (just as they do with you).
• Keep calm : frequently, whoever is false or hypocritical wants to upset you with their way of acting. Calm down, breathe and do not show that they have affected you, because that confirms his way of acting.Do not lower yourself to their level : if you are not that way, do not lower yourself to their level, because you will be degrading yourself and entering a costume that is not yours. I restricted any desire for revenge, rudeness or act of bad faith.
• The Fake Person Preys on the Good Guys : Usually targeted are personalities who give room for them to manifest. When you show yourself firmly, decisively and without space for them to act, they withdraw and look for another "victim".
• Do not speak ill of that person : a tendency is that, even if you do not want to do any harm, you talk to other people about that person's behavior. The suggestion is to avoid doing it, so as not to fall into the same mechanism. Just ignore it and get over it internally.
• If your friend is false or hypocritical, talk about it : You will have to make a decision, because in occasional social relationships, for example, an outing, a dinner, or someone you have not seen for decades as study partners, perhaps you can be more flexible to letting go of falsehood or hypocrisy behavior. In the event that someone much closer, such as friends, family and a very intimate environment, behaves in this way, your life will be crossed by unpleasant emotions. Right now, go straight ahead, present your vision of the facts, and prepare for the thrust, because there will be resistance and denial from the other party.

In any case, do not get upset no matter how difficult things are, because what is usually sought is for you to get out of your axis. Be courteous, yet firm, in deciding if this person deserves to remain in your circle. Possibly, it will not be the last time you are faced with situations with false or hypocritical people: the difference is that you have these tools to reflect and be able to adopt if you consider it appropriate.