Innocence

I would simply do anything for my innocence back. Even for a piece. I crave it like I am having a withdrawal, almost like I need it. Truth be told I do not remember what it feels like to be innocent. I had my innocence stolen from me at such a young age. From being exposed to many horrible things it left me scared. Through many battles and invisible battle scars, the trials and tribulations, somewhere along those lines I lost it all. As if my innocence packed its bags and moved far away, never to be seen again. I felt so lost, like I was sailing a ship without my compass. Even though I was young I was grown because I matured from pain not age. I believed there was something wrong with me, this left me feeling empty. I tried to fill the void with anything I could. With the wrong guidance I went spiraling down a path no young girl should go down. Once I realized that the empty could only be filled temporarily. I was so broken I gave up for a long time. Thinking back to those times I do not even remember anything. Until I got to the age where I knew enough was enough, I could not keep going through the same toxic cycle. I had to learn from my losses and take those lessons and not repeat my mistakes. It was time I make something out of myself. So, I took time and really discovered who I was, I am no longer lost, and the trials and tribulations made me the person I am today and for that I am thankful. If I can do it so can you. My purpose for writing this is for you. Whoever is reading this and is going through this right now and feels empty, lost, or even hopeless. I hope somehow this message will find someone who needs to hear it. I am here to tell you that the pain does not last forever, one day what you are going through right now will make you who you are meant to be. Life may not always be easy but it sure is beautiful. So please do not waste one second more dwelling on whatever it may be that comes to mind when you read that. Healing takes time, so be patient with yourself and keep one foot in front of the other as you choose to heal from what broke you. When you are ready to say I am no longer a prisoner to my sorrow, is when you will be totally free. I believe in you because you are capable of changing your life right now. You can get up and say that you will never let your mind control you. Instead control your mind and find peace of mind from within. Let these words inspire you and may you find the motivation from within. Remember that the healing process looks different for everyone only you know what you need healing from. Forget all about your past because it does not exist anymore, look around in this present moment and notice that the only thing you have is this moment right now. So, live in it and do not waste a single moment more. You have this one life to be or do anything you want. So go out and get it and remember that you will never see success without failure, use your failures as motivation instead. Count to 10 and take a deep breathe on every count, and remember that everything will be okay.